With You, I'm Home
by dantsolo
Summary: Several months after ROTJ, Han and Leia settle into their new home on Chandrilla. Much love and happiness, very little drama. As their life together unfolds, major life decisions must be made.
1. Chapter 1: Home

Thank you to any and all who decide to read this :) This story is Mickey Mouse canon-ish, my take on post ROTJ, the first few years. This is my attempt to "fix" all of the wrongs by Disney. I am certain that Han and Leia had a happy marriage. This fic makes NO ALLUSIONS TO ANY FUTURE PROBLEMS. Hope you like it!

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With You, I'm Home

By Dant Solo

Leia Organa's eyes swept across the large penthouse apartment, wondering if she could ever consider this home. The main room was filled with a great deal of empty space, punctuated here and there by furniture and decoration. Close to the glassteel wall that allowed a sprawling view of Chandrila's capitol of Hanna City, was a sofa flanked by a love seat and a chair. All of them were red, black, and sleek, with large, swirling circles on either side, very formal in appearance.

Opposite the wall of windows stood a tremendous screen for use with the holoplayer that resided at the base. Massive, white vases were sprinkled around the room and there were long shelving units lining either side, widthwise.

The shelves were bare and it occurred to Leia that she owned nothing with which to adorn them with. Her few belongings would be arriving later in the day, minus the items she kept on the Millennium Falcon.

There were several other rooms to explore in this apartment the New Republic had assigned to her, but at the moment, she was overwhelmed by this one. So, she remained in place, taking it all in, uncertain what she felt.

Was it normal to be so ambivalent about a home one hadn't chosen? Or did she feel so strange because she had been without a home for so long? She did not own enough things to make it feel like she lived there. Perhaps when Han arrived, it might feel more like their home, together. At the moment, she felt as if she would just have to exist in discomfort in this unfamiliar place.

Wandering to the sofa, she sat down and tried it out. It was not as comfortable as she would have liked, but it would do. A sudden loneliness stole over her and she wished very much that Han were there with her.

She had not seen him in a month and it would be another two weeks before he returned from the conflict at Fallinor. Looking at her surroundings, she could not imagine Han feeling at home there. But, maybe together they could make it a home. And it did not have to be permanent.

Having acquainted herself with the living room, she wandered into the next room, the kitchen. She squinted at the sight. It was very white and bright. The wall on the right curved into the billowing shape of a wave with a long, curved shelf along it. What she might put on that shelf, she didn't know.

In the middle of the room stood a tall, white counter that looked as if it could seat three people on its white, backless stools. The far wall was pink with slats that held compartments for storage. Two more pink pantries were situated to the left behind a low counter that contained a cooking unit and sink, both of which were white and blended into the counter so as to be almost camouflaged. Beyond that was a light pink cooling unit.

Leia felt as if she were drowning in a vat of puffer candies. Shaking her head, she left the room.

What greeted her next was a dining room that she could actually live with. Light colored wood, simple lines. It worked.

She came to the bedroom and halted, a slow smile spreading like the rising warmth of the sun. _This_ could be home.

The large bed was situated in a wooden alcove, giving the impression of privacy. The curved ceiling of the alcove was black and stippled with stars. She thought Han might really like that particular touch. The bedding was cream and burgundy and looked very nice with the color of the wood.

Lining the room were two wooden dressers, a love seat and a few plants. But, the bed was the central focus. Leia smiled brightly, picturing Han and herself lazing in bed, making love, sleeping.

Yes, this could be home.


	2. Chapter 2: Welcome

Thank you all so much for the warm reception to this new story :) And now, the much awaited scoundrel ;)

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Having finished the debriefing about Fallinor, Han found himself with an uncharacteristic spring to his step as he wended his way through the corridor towards the turbolift that would take him to the floor of Leia's new apartment. The past six weeks had been far too long and lonely without her.

This General thing was much less fun without her by his side. But, Leia was not born for war, she was born for peace. Fighting had been a necessary evil for her. Now, her place was in the diplomatic realm.

He entered the lift, programmed its destination, and stood, foot tapping impatiently. The seconds it took to reach its stop felt infinite in length.

When the door hissed open, the smile was already tugging at his lips. He was well aware of how Leia affected him, including the goofy smile that the thought of her imbued. In the past, he would have scoffed at anyone sporting such a smile. Somehow, it had become his reality.

He realized Leia's was the only door on this floor then quickly surmised that this was the penthouse. He did not yet have the entrance code, so he rang the indicator bell. A few moments passed and he imagined she must be checking the security cam.

The door flew open and she was suddenly in his arms before his eyes had barely registered her. He embraced her tightly and that unidentifiable something that had been missing inside him fell gently, exquisitely into place. Han felt whole.

Her low, husky voice drifted up to his ears. "Gods, I've missed you."

That familiar warmth burst in his chest, as had only ever happened with Leia. He smiled, squeezing her more tightly to him. "Missed you, too."

She pulled back, gazed at him for just a moment then tipped her head up to be kissed. With a grin, he leaned down to oblige.

Lips still pressed together, she grabbed him by the lapels of his uniform jacket and walked backwards into the apartment, pulling him along with her. Eyes closed, Han enjoyed every second of it, smiling against her mouth.

When she released him, their eyes took each other in, roaming across the sorely missed features, twin smiles blazing. Leia's hand reached up to caress his cheek, as if she couldn't truly believe he was there.

"I want to take you to bed," she said breathlessly. "But, I also want to show you the apartment."

"So, show me the apartment," his deep voice rumbled seductively. "Then take me to bed."

"That sounds like an excellent compromise." She grinned at him then turned and gestured expansively. "The main room," she declared.

He looked up and took the room in. It was huge. Not a lot of furniture but he liked the colors, black and red. His head moved from side to side. "Not bad." He removed his uniform jacket and flung it onto the chair then opened the collar of his shirt, breathing a sigh of relief.

"You don't think it's a bit too formal?"

"I think anything nicer than the Falcon's crew lounge is too formal, so don't ask me."

She smirked at him and took his arm. "I'm going to skip the kitchen for now."

"Why?"

"Don't ask." She shook her head brusquely and guided him down a hallway. "The dining room."

Simple. "Nice."

"You don't have much to say."

He shrugged. "It's your place."

Her eyes narrowed in confusion before becoming large and vulnerable, her mouth frowning, almost petulant. "My place? Aren't you going to live here with me?"

They had never discussed it and Han hadn't thought about it. Leia always had her own quarters at whatever base or on whichever ship she was assigned to. Han spent many a night with her in all of them when he was not away on missions. Other nights, she joined him on the Falcon. His eyebrows shot up. "Am I?"

Her hands fell away from his arm and her mouth shaped to a questioning circle. For a moment, she looked so small and forlorn that it gashed his heart a bit.

He took her hand in both of his. "Sweetheart, we've never talked about living together."

"We've never had a place to live." She had withdrawn into herself, he could tell by the tension in her form, the way her eyes had gone dead and stormy. "But, I always just assumed…" She trailed off, lowering her gaze.

With Leia, Han had never assumed. He had always waited for confirmation, even if he had to force it out of her, as he had done while fleeing Hoth. He knew he was lucky, luckier than he deserved to be, to have this amazing woman love him. He didn't take it for granted.

He raised a hand to her cheek and her eyes returned to his. "Sweetheart, do you want me to live here?"

Her defenses had already risen. "Not if you don't want to."

A man of action, he swiftly leaned down and captured her lips with his. For a moment, she was resistive, stiff and unyielding. But, when his tongue brushed her upper lip, she began to relax until, finally, her mouth opened beneath his.

Breathless, they parted and Leia's eyes reluctantly opened, remaining conflictive. Han's gentle finger traced the contours of her chin, his eyes following the movement before looking into hers.

"You know I don't wanna be without you," he reminded in a low timbre.

She relaxed visibly, tension draining from her features before being replaced by a measure of sheepishness. Her gaze flickered, wavered, became steady again. "I'm sorry, I got worried for a minute there."

His lazy half-grin spread to one side of his face. "Good to know you care."

One brow aimed at him and a slight glower marred the perfection of her beauty. "Looking for a little ego boost, were you?"

He chuckled and pulled her close. "We both know there's nothing wrong with my ego."

Her arms went around him and her voice floated from the place beneath his chin where she fit perfectly. "Yes, except that it's overblown."

He chuckled again, enjoying her thoroughly. "Hey," he said softly. "Enough of the grand tour. Where's the bedroom in this place?"

She pulled back to look up at him, eyes suddenly sparkling. "Oh, wait until you see the bedroom." She began to pull him by one hand down the corridor.

With a gentle tug, Han slowed their pace and moved to cradle her from behind, arms slipping around her slim waist, his form pressed against her, legs moving forward in unison.

"Mmmm…" she breathed, hands closing over his.

"You feel too damn good," he muttered beside her ear. "We might not make it to the bedroom."

She laughed breathlessly. At the end of the hallway, the door slid aside and they stumbled into the room, smiling. Leia abruptly stopped and spun to face him. Han was aware of nothing but her as his hands slowly slid down her back to cup her buttocks and pull her to press intimately against him, already hard and ready.

A sharp intake of breath and Leia's eyes darkened and softened with passion. Before he could kiss her again, she placed a hand against his chest. "Slow down, Hotshot. Take a look around." She moved from his grasp, watching his reaction.

With a sigh, Han's eyes roamed the room, landed on the bed, and he smiled with sudden focus. He liked the way the bed was set apart from the room, its own private oasis. The canopy of stars gave the impression of sitting in the cockpit of the Falcon.

He grinned down at Leia. "Now, that is the best bed I could possibly imagine making love to you on." He whisked her up in his arms and, in a few quick strides, stood before the bed. He tossed her onto the mattress and she shrieked in surprise. Han laughed heartily and dropped on top of her, leaning slightly to one side, careful not to crush her.

With a soft trickle of laughter, she smiled up at him. "I knew you would like it."

"I do. But, I'd live in a shipping crate with you."

She laughed softly, beaming up at him in adoration. Her smile slowly faded when his hand moved to her breast, quickly finding her nipple through the thin shirt. He grazed it with his palm, eyes on the slow caress.

A low groan escaped her and her eyes fell shut. Han continued to tease her nipple, closely watching her every subtle reaction. Her passionate responses drove him wild. The way her brow furrowed, her mouth eased open, her breath became shallow…every soft sound inflamed him as no other woman had.

Removing his hand from her breast, he began to slowly open the fastenings of her shirt. Her eyes opened, intent on his own. The haze of passion and emotion he saw there never failed to move him. Looking in Leia's eyes was like watching the stars. It gave him the same sense of awe and wonder. Nothing else had ever inspired him in such a way.

He pulled the shirt open and ran a slow hand from her neck down to her stomach. Her eyes closed and a soft breath flew from her lips. For a moment, he just admired the perfection of her creamy, soft skin, the flatness of her stomach, the swell of her breasts.

"You are so damned beautiful," he whispered hoarsely.

Her eyes opened to his and she smiled, that pure, joyful smile that was reserved for him. He couldn't help the responding grin that overtook him.

Her smile faded and the passion in her eyes reignited. She sat up, shrugged her arms from the shirt then reached back to unclasp her bra, before tossing both garments to the floor.

Han smiled at her quick efficiency as her hands flew to the bottom of his shirt and flung it up over his head. It joined her clothes on the floor. Her warm hands were instantly on his chest, shoulders, back, eyes following the smooth caress. One hand trailed up his neck to stroke his cheek.

"Missed you so much," she whispered, smiling softly and running her other hand across his shoulder.

He pulled her close, running his hands along her spine, feeling that overwhelming sensation of drowning in her that came over him in moments of extreme emotion. Kissing her slowly, deeply, he slid his hands into the back of her pants, gently kneading her buttocks. She moaned into his mouth, laid back on the bed, and pulled him on top of her.

All thought was lost then, as a frenzy built between them. Han was already hard and straining against his pants when Leia's hand slid inside to grip him with tantalizing fingers. His breath caught with a moan as the magic of her touch brought everything else to a standstill. An endless time later and she was tugging at his pants. He reached down and awkwardly pulled them off as she did the same, and now there was nothing between them but the silkiness of their skin.

They groaned together, breath intermingling, reveling in the sensation for a moment. They kissed for an endless time, hands reacquainting with the lines and angles of each other's bodies. Han grabbed her wrists and, gently yet firmly, held them down on either side of her. He motioned for her to turn over and, when she was lying on her stomach, he flipped the long, dark curtain of her hair up and out of the way.

Starting at the hairline at the top of her neck, he let his tongue draw an excruciatingly slow path down her neck, across her shoulders, down her back. She gasped at the pleasure, over and over, fanning the flames building inside him. His tongue made its way back up to her neck, gliding across to the lobe of her ear. A breath hissed through her teeth and her hips were grinding into the mattress.

"I want you inside me, Han…now." Her voice was a throaty whisper.

She knew how to drive him to the edge. He let out a sound between a groan and a growl and turned her over, one hand reaching between her thighs to find her so wet and silky. He could no longer wait.

Impossibly hard and burning with need, he placed himself between her legs and slid slowly inside her, moaning at the intense heat of her. With extraordinary restraint, he stopped himself when he was halfway buried inside her, intent on teasing her and drawing out the pleasure for them both. Her moan strangled and became a groan of torture as she raised her hips to urge him deeper.

He pulled back to the point of almost leaving her. "Is this what you want, Princess?" he growled, closely watching every nuance of her reaction.

"Yes," she breathed desperately, eyelids half closed.

His intent had been to draw out the sweet torment, but he found himself unable to curb his lust for fulfillment. In one swift thrust, he buried himself inside her with a deep growl. She cried out and her hips met his with a passionate fervor. Overwhelmed for a moment, he remained unmoving, taking deep breaths to slow his excitement. It had been far too long.

She thrust up against him again, showing him what she wanted and was ready for, then all pretense of taking things slowly melted away with his groan of ecstasy. He drove into her with all the weeks of longing, the steamy feel of her sweeping his senses until nothing existed but the hot flesh surrounding him, pulsating, gripping him in the most intimate embrace. Dimly aware of her cries of pleasure melding with his, he thrust deeper, faster, forcing them both towards climax.

The last vestiges of control fled him as Leia began to quiver around him, hips bucking convulsively, hands clenching his buttocks. As she rode out the throes of orgasm, the thrilling wave of nirvana claimed him, obliterating everything from his awareness but the unbelievable feeling of streaming inside her, filling her, satiating them both.

In that delicious moment afterwards, he was aware of nothing but the harshness of his breath, the feeling of utter depletion and contentment. Reality quickly returned, imbuing him with the deep feelings of love and gratitude that always followed their love making. How had this amazing woman happened to him?

In this most vulnerable moment, their eyes caught, held, exposing the depth and force of their feelings. Doubts and insecurities fled as feelings lay bare, understood without question, and words were not needed.

Then, the intimacy was suddenly more than Han could take and he leaned down, closed his eyes, and broke the spell with a soft, lingering kiss.

"I love you," Leia breathed against his lips.

He kept his lips still for a moment, basking in her words. "I love you, too." Rolling to his side, he wrapped his arms around her and smoothly brought her with him. She came to lie on top of him, head on his chest, legs entwined with his, hands resting against his shoulders.

"We're going to have a nice life here." Her breath whispered against his chest.

The words were hazy to Han, vague and insubstantial. He focused on the here and now.

"Certainly better than in a shipping crate," she added.

He chuckled softly. "I dunno," he rumbled into her hair then placed a kiss on the top of her head. "It could be pretty cozy."

Her hand moved to run a caress down his arm. "Yes, but Chewie could never visit."

"Luke could though," Han said with a grin. His friend's short stature was a running joke that never failed to amuse him.

"Oh, hush," she admonished, but he could hear the affection in her voice. "How was the debriefing?"

"Fine." He hated meetings and hated talking about them almost as much. His stomach growled and he realized he hadn't eaten since midday. "Anything to eat around here?"

Her head rose to look at him, hair spilling deliciously around her shoulders. "Yes. Let's go see what we can heat up for you." A finger rose to trace the outline of his lower lip and he took it in his mouth and sucked gently. Her eyes grew smoky as they watched his slow movements. "Keep that up and we won't be leaving the bedroom."

"Don't worry, Sweetheart," he murmured. "We'll be right back after I get my stamina back."

She smiled and hopped out of bed, grabbing his hand and leading him through the hallway, the dining room, and into the kitchen.

Upon entering, the room hit Han square in the face and he blinked in astonishment. His voice rang out in the silence.

"What the hell is this?"


	3. Chapter 3:Family

Thank you all for reading and reviewing! To those wondering what is in the kitchen, please refer back to Chapter one and all will be clear :D

On to Chapter 3, with new appearances by other well-loved characters...

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Leia was busy emptying cartons of food onto plates when the vidcomm chimed. Frazzled, she stood for a moment holding a large spoon in one hand and a food carton in the other. She was having enough trouble organizing and distributing the food they had ordered in. People actually cooked it as well? When did they find the time?

Her afternoon had been harried and, for a moment, she considered yelling for Han to get the comm. Instead, she took a deep sigh, dropped everything on the counter, and strode into the main room. A desk she had added to the corner held the comm system. She sat down, checked the ID, and an excited smile sprung to her lips. She pressed the button to activate the vid screen.

Luke's smiling face filled the screen.

"Luke!"

"Leia, hi. How are you?"

"I'm good. How have you been?"

"I've been good. Guess what?"

"What?"

"I'm here."

Her eyes went wide. "You're on Chandrila?"

His grin grew wider. "Yes, I'm at the Capitol Building. I'd like to pop over for a bit."

"Yes!" This was the best news she had received in quite some time. "We were going to eat dinner, but we'll wait on you."

"Don't wait on my account."

"We're waiting for you," she said in her best no-nonsense tone that refused argument.

"Okay, okay. I'll be over shortly."

"Can't wait to see you," she said earnestly before deactivating the comm.

Food forgotten, Leia's step held a sudden bounce as she went to the dining room. Han sat with Chewie, a semi-permanent resident in their apartment, at the table where they sipped on bottles of ale.

Han was sprawled casually in his chair. He looked up as Leia entered. "When're we gonna eat, Sweetheart?"

"Not yet. Luke is here!"

Chewie hooted and Han sat up straighter. "On-planet?"

"Yes." She was almost buzzing with excitement.

Chewie growled questioningly and Leia gave him a cursory glance.

"We're waiting for Luke to get here."

The Wookiee roared in displeasure.

Leia smiled patiently. "You'll just have to wait. I want Luke to eat with us."

Chewie crossed his furry arms over his chest and grumbled under his breath. Wookiees did not like to wait for food.

She aimed a brow in his direction. It always amused her when he pouted. "How about a snack while you wait?" she soothed.

He perked up instantly and whuffled softly.

"I don't know what we have, but feel free to look."

He lumbered from the chair and down the hallway.

Han's chin rose and he crooked a finger at her. "C'mere," he beckoned, his voice low and deep, like distant thunder.

Smiling, she crossed to where he sat and, with casual ease, he pulled her into his lap.

"What's Luke doing here?"

"He didn't say."

He was still wearing his uniform shirt and pants and looking past her with an odd expression.

"What's wrong?" she asked with quiet concern.

"Just wondering how long he's gonna be here. With me shipping out in two days, it'd be nice for you to have the company."

More and more these days, Han looked troubled when he had to leave. "I'll miss you," she reassured.

His lips pressed together and bunched to one side. "Like always," he sighed.

Leia placed her forehead against his and cupped his chin in her hand, stroking it with her thumb. "I hate when one of us is away," she whispered.

"It's mostly me who's away." His voice was heavy with regret. "Most of the time when you have to leave, I'm not even here."

She pulled back to gaze at his disheartened expression. "I know. It's the path we've chosen." Unlike Han, she had long ago grown used to sacrificing her personal desires for the greater good. It came naturally at this point.

"It's a shitty path," he said sourly.

"I know." She pressed her lips to his brow and his arms tightened around her.

"Doesn't it get to you?" There was a hint of resentment in his voice.

"Of course it does," she soothed. "I come home every night and wish I was getting in bed next to you." She leaned her head on his shoulder.

He seemed somewhat mollified.

"It won't always be like this."

He snorted lightly. "Yeah, sure it won't."

"It won't. We're slowly wiping out the remnants of the Empire. In time, there will be less military activity."

"Yeah, in ten years," he said petulantly.

"I don't think it will be quite that long," she chided. Seeking to distract him from his melancholy, Leia moved her mouth to his neck and began placing moist kisses along the line above his collar.

"Mmm…" His voice vibrated against her lips and she smiled, trailing a path to his ear. Her teeth nipped at the lobe and his breath caught sharply.

The thud of heavy footsteps intruded and Chewie's irritated growl halted her actions. Leia looked up to see him sitting across from them with a large bowl of pooka chips.

"You don't like it, Buddy, go find someone else to mooch food from."

He snarled at Han and Leia smiled, fairly certain she had understood the Wookiee's complaint about memories of the trip to Bespin. At the time, they had been so wrapped up in each other, they hadn't given a thought to how annoying their affair might be to someone residing on the Falcon with them.

That trip seemed a lifetime ago, had only one year really passed? When she looked back, she felt like a completely different person than she had been at the time. Losing Han at Bespin had changed her, shown her that she needed more than just her fight against the Empire. She had always been wiser than her years, but when it came to romance, she had been an innocent. Han had unfolded a part of her that had been sorely neglected. She had barely been aware it existed. But, once he had fanned those flames, the fire had blazed to a crescendo that consumed her. Now, she couldn't imagine her life without him.

And the news about her parentage…it had crushed her, and yet made her stronger.

And here she was, with an entirely new life. Having lost everything she had and everything she was, she had resigned herself to life at war. Now, although there was still the aftershock of the Empire to battle against, she had regained her former title of Senator, forging a future of peace, with the man she loved by her side. She felt more like her old self, before the destruction of Alderaan, and yet decidedly different.

The door chimed and Leia practically sprinted from Han's lap into the main room. Without even checking the security cam, she slapped a hand on the controls and the door slid open.

Luke's grin mirrored her own and when he stepped through the threshold, they embraced each other, Leia squeezing him tightly. As her only living blood relative, whenever she saw her twin brother, she felt as if something she never knew had been missing was suddenly right there.

"So happy you're here," she said beside his ear.

"I'm happy to be here." His tone was as upbeat and enthusiastic as hers.

They broke apart and Leia looked at him, still smiling. He looked older, somehow and she wondered if she did too.

"Together again!" Han's voice burst from behind her. He looked almost as pleased to see Luke as she felt.

"Han!" Luke called.

In a few strides, they met in the middle of the room and clasped hands. Luke quickly grabbed Han in a brief hug that seemed to take the older man by surprise. He recovered quickly and clapped Luke on the back.

Leia moved to Luke's side, feeling grateful to have the two most important beings in her life right there. These days, it happened all too infrequently.

"What brings you here to grace us with your presence?" Han asked flippantly.

"I met with Chancellor Mothma to discuss my search for history of the Jedi."

She frowned slightly. "She didn't mention that to me."

"Did ya find anything?" Han asked.

Before Luke could answer, Chewie lumbered into the room, roaring a loud greeting. He bombarded Luke with a hug that lifted him from the floor.

Luke laughed heartily. "Hi, Chewie. I missed you, too." He patted the Wookiee's furry shoulders as he was replaced onto the floor.

Chewie barked a question.

"You're still hungry?" Han asked incredulously.

Leia and Luke exchanged a glance of amusement.

"Come on, we can eat now that Luke is here." She took her brother by the hand and they all trooped into the dining room.

"This is a great apartment," Luke observed.

"Yes, we like it." She gestured for Luke to sit at the table. "I'll be right back with the food."

In the kitchen, Leia was surprised to find that Han had followed behind her. He smiled when she glanced up at him and she was pleased that his mood had lightened.

"I have to heat it up," she said, lips curving upwards.

"I'll help you serve it." He leaned on the corner of the counter and propped his chin in one hand, watching her as she placed the containers in the heating unit and turned it on.

She turned and met his gaze. He was smiling in his lazy, lopsided way. "What?"

He shook his head dismissively. "I just like to watch you."

One eyebrow rose. "Why is that?"

His lashes lowered, eyes simmering. "Cause you're sexy."

The other brow rose to meet its mate. "Am I?" she asked, enjoying the flirtation. At the moment, she felt as if all the stars had perfectly aligned.

He stood and began a slow swagger to stand in front of her. "Oh yeah." He said in a low, deep voice. As he bent to kiss her, the heating unit beeped. He slowed to a stop and gave it an irritated glance.

His expression caused her lips to purse in amusement. "Sorry, my love, time for dinner."

With a confident smirk, he bent down and seized her lips in a long, steamy kiss that quickly sped up her pulse rate.

"That's okay, Sweetheart," he whispered against her still-parted lips. "I know what I'll be having for dessert later."

She then quickly turned and removed the cartons from the unit. She handed him a carton and together they filled the plates, Leia adding another to the counter for Luke. They carried the plates inside and Chewie growled with unbridled anticipation. Han and she doled out the plates and Han disappeared again into the kitchen.

He returned with four ales and passed them around. Once they were all seated, Leia was more interested in talking to Luke than in eating.

"So, Luke, what have you found?"

Luke chewed for a moment then swallowed before answering. "I was able to recover fragments of a Force sensitive tree that was once in the former Jedi Temple."

"A tree?" As always, Han sounded skeptical.

Luke nodded. "Two living twigs from the tree."

Han's expression was deadpan. "So, twigs. You found some twigs."

One side of Luke's mouth curled into a smile. He was used to Han by now. When he glanced at Leia, she just rolled her eyes.

"Some very important twigs," Luke said lightly.

"Where did you find them?" she asked.

"At an Imperial research facility on Vetine." He nodded acknowledgement to Han. "Those codes you got at the ISB base came in handy."

Replacing his ale on the table, Han flashed a cocky grin. "Of course they did, Kid."

"How did the tree end up on Ventine?" Leia asked.

"When the Emperor converted the Jedi Temple into the Imperial Palace, he had the tree removed. I suppose he sent it there to be researched. Or maybe just to get it out of his sight, I don't know."

Chewie roared a question from across the table and Luke looked up from his plate.

"I plan to plant the remains of the tree when I'm able to begin training new Jedi." He paused and turned towards Leia. "I hope that when the time comes, you will join me," he said softly.

Leia was abruptly uncomfortable, as if she had just been pricked by a sucker bush. She forced her eyes on Luke, avoiding Han's stare. And she was certain he was staring and, most likely, scowling. Her eyes flicked to her plate then back up again. "We will see."

"Leia, it's your destiny."

She did not wish to rehash this conversation, especially in front of Han. "I have too much on my plate right now to think of anything else."

Luke's hand reached to cover Leia's. "The galaxy needs Jedi now more than ever. And you are so strong in the Force, you could be a powerful Jedi, if you just opened yourself to the possibility."

She was staring down at their joined hands, a dark foreboding filling her. "I don't think that's the path that I am to follow, Luke."

"How can you say that?" Luke asked quietly. "There are plenty of Senators. The galaxy needs Jedi, we—"

"She said no!" Han growled forcefully and everyone went as deathly quiet as the vacuum of space.

Leia's entire body went taught, mouth pinched. This was exactly what she had been trying to avoid. It was a long moment before she was able to look at Luke. He sat rigidly, eyes on his plate, expression mild. She stole a glance at Han, who glared down at his plate and continued eating.

"I should go," Luke declared, beginning to stand.

"No, Luke, don't go." She wouldn't see him leave so quickly.

Han rose and held up a hand. "Don't leave," he said contritely. "I'm sorry. Stay. It's been too long since we've seen you."

Chewie grumbled in soft agreement.

Luke seemed to take a breath then nodded with a small smile and sat down. Han sat as well.

After a tense silence, Leia forced small talk into the awkward, strained atmosphere. Chewbacca picked up the thread of conversation while Han and Luke said little.

When the meal was over, Han and Chewie cleaned up the aftermath while Leia led Luke to the balcony. The door swished shut behind them and they took a seat in the two chairs facing the night. It was quiet and still so high up and they settled comfortably, having left the tension behind.

"Don't mind Han," she said breezily. "He just worries about me."

He smiled slightly. "He always did. Even when he wouldn't admit it."

She smiled back, memories of a seemingly distant past flying through her mind. Her head rested against the back of her chair.

Luke turned towards her. "Leia, I hate to see you waste your talent."

She sighed. "I have other talents that are just as important, if not more so."

"What could be more important than bringing the Jedi back to again be the guardians of the galaxy? You know what happened when the Jedi were extinguished."

A trickle of irritation was beginning crawl through her and her head rose to look at him. She didn't want this visit to degenerate into an argument. She kept her voice low and steady. "That is your mission, to revive the Jedi. Not mine."

He took her hand suddenly and held it tightly, voice gathering passion. "It can be yours, too. We can do it together. This is our legacy, Leia."

Her eyes shrank to slits beneath the lowered crinkles in her forehead. "Don't start that again," she said more harshly than intended.

"You can't keep denying it."

"I'm not denying anything. I acknowledge who our father was. And that's exactly why I don't want to follow in his footsteps."

"He started out as a good man. And he ended as one."

Leia pulled her hand from his, probably more roughly than she would have liked. Her voice grew hard. "And in between, he was a monster."

"He was seduced by the dark side."

"Exactly."

"But, in the end, he's the one who killed the Emperor."

"And that's supposed to make up for a lifetime of evil?" Leia was suddenly cold and wrapped her arms around herself.

"I didn't say it makes up for it."

She stood, still hugging herself. "Good. Because, it doesn't."

Luke rose to face her. "Don't denounce the part of our father that was good."

Leia glowered. "I'm sorry," she said tightly. "It's difficult to banish the memory of watching my home planet being blown to dust."

"That was Tarkin."

"Oh, and you think Vader wasn't a part of that? As he stood behind me and held me back when Tarkin gave the order to fire?" Now, her anger was genuine; she could feel her eyes blazing.

Luke sighed and lowered his eyes. "I'm sorry. I don't want us to argue. This just means so much to me."

She softened in light of his repentance. Taking his hand in hers, she lightened her tone. "I know it does. But, please understand, that to me it means something different. To me it means starting down a path that could lead to darkness. And that's not something I want. I want peace. I've worked hard for it and I am still working for it. This is where I belong."

He sighed and Leia could tell by his eyes that he would not give up on this yet. She was certain he would revisit it in the future. But, he was her brother and she loved him. He was the other half of herself, no one else could share that bond of blood.

She reached forward, embraced him, and his arms went around her in return. They lingered in the familial comfort. It was so odd to her that the revelation of her paternity could bring her such trauma and yet such assuagement. To have a brother, family again, gave her back a tiny piece of what she had lost.

They smiled warmly into each other's eyes and sat back down.

"So, what have you been doing?" Luke asked.

She sighed at the thought. "Too much. Trying to establish the New Republic is daunting." She pushed a hand past her braids. "Every day we bring in the support of new worlds. And with them come more opinions and dissent about how we should proceed. I spend a lot of time arguing."

Luke's lips quirked to a smile. "Good thing you had years of practice with Han."

She laughed in spite of herself.

"Things are good with you and Han?"

"Yes. Very good." Her smile was genuine.

"Will you two get married?"

She blinked, startled by the question. "I don't know. We haven't discussed it. There's so much going on, it's hard to think past right now."

His gaze lowered. "Have you thought about having children?"

Where was this coming from? "No," she said tersely. "Why do you ask?"

He returned his eyes to hers. "I've thought about it. How any children we have would be strong with the Force."

Back to that again. Her lips folded together for a moment. She had adamantly forced herself _not_ to think about that. "Is there someone you plan on having a child with?" she asked pointedly.

His eyes widened in surprise. "No."

"Then I don't see any reason to think about children."

"You've found someone," he said meaningfully.

"Are you trying to find out if you can use me as a Jedi baby machine?" she asked archly.

"No!" He seemed shocked. "Of course not!"

She raised her eyebrows and turned back to the night.

"These are just things I think about," he explained. "I have no one else to talk about them with."

She softened towards him, realizing he felt alone in the universe, as he had felt as a boy on Tatooine. As she had felt, after Alderaan had been destroyed. "I'm always here to talk to. I just don't appreciate being told how I should live my life."

"Sorry."

"It's okay," she said and meant it. She had found her place. He was still adrift, searching.

"Things seemed almost simpler when we were fighting the war."

She smiled wryly. "I know what you mean. We knew who we were fighting against, who was on our side. Now, everything is complicated, every day is something unexpected."

"At least your role is established. I'm struggling to start a new Jedi Order. I barely know where to start."

"You'll find your way," she reassured. "I have faith in you."

His smile was the most genuine of the evening. Leia stood, held out a hand, and tugged him to his feet.

"Let's go see what those two troublemakers are up to." She inclined her head towards the door.

Hand in hand, they traipsed through the apartment then entered the kitchen. Han and Chewie were not there. Leia turned back to Luke to find him smirking in disbelief as his eyes roamed the garish room.

"What happened here?" His voice held a hint of amusement.

"Don't get me started."


	4. Chapter 4: Disgruntled

Thank you all for reading :) And especially for taking the time to review, I greatly appreciate it :)

This chapter is short but significant...

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She decided she had grown use to the kitchen. Or perhaps desensitized was a better word for it.

Han glanced up from the where he leaned over the kaffe maker at the counter, expression grim. He was wearing his uniform pants and shirt, which was hanging open.

"Kaffe maker's broken."

Leia sighed. "Well, that's an intergalactic tragedy." She was surprised when he didn't come back with a snappy remark. "I'll order a new one later."

"That doesn't help me now," he grumbled.

She turned to the cooling unit and rolled her eyes. Han had been irritable for the past few days and things had been strained between them. He insisted nothing was wrong, no matter how many times she questioned him.

Grabbing a bottle of water, she turned back to find him rifling through a cabinet.

"One of us really needs to learn to cook around here," he muttered.

"Have at it, Flyboy," she said flippantly before downing some water.

He spun to face her, eyes and mouth hard. "You're just full of smartass answers this morning."

Her hackles rose and she bit back the retort she truly wished to hand him. "You're in a stellar mood," she said simply, closing the cooling unit and sitting at the counter.

He glowered, closed the cabinets, and moved to open the cooling unit.

"I need to get dressed. Now I have to stop for kaffe before my early meeting." She hated early meetings. It was hard enough to drag herself to the office on time, much less getting there early. Her assistant wouldn't be in yet, so she couldn't even ask him to fetch her kaffe.

Han spun towards her. "You're leaving already? I'm gonna be gone for at least three weeks."

"I know. But I have a meeting."

"You always do," he sneered.

Now she was becoming angry. "I have no choice."

He slammed the door to the cooling unit shut. "Fine. Go."

She slipped from the chair and placed her hands on her hips, jaw taut. "What is wrong with you?"

He turned and left the room but his voice travelled back, assaulting her ears. "Why do I even come back? You're never here."

Something dark burrowed into her chest, freezing her in place. For a moment, she couldn't move. She pushed her feet forward and followed in his wake to the bedroom.

He had closes the fasteners of his shirt and was now aggressively tucking the bottom into his pants. Leia crossed her arms over her chest, her eyebrows slanted to meet just above her eyes.

"So, you're angry with me because I spend too much time working. Following that twisted line of thinking, I should be angry with you for being away so often."

He grabbed his jacket from the back of a chair and whirled to face her with a sneer. "That's different."

Her head snapped back. "And just how is that different?"

"Cause you like your job and I'm only doing mine for you!" he shouted, leaning towards her with his fists clenched.

Tears clouded her throat and, for a moment, she couldn't breathe. Her eyes widened to avoid the tears that threatened. She swallowed hard before her voice burst forth, an angry whisper. "If you recall, I never, ever asked you to become a general."

"Well, you spent three years nagging me about it, I knew you'd never accept anything less than me being an official member of the Alliance. How could I be worthy of the Princess if I was just a smuggler?"

Leia felt as if she had been slapped. "Is that what you think? That I deemed you unworthy?"

He didn't answer, only maintained his stony rigidity. His glare remained steadfast on hers.

Something hard and cold slammed shut inside her, an old barricade that had almost grown unfamiliar at this point. Her voice became icy. "I guess you don't know me at all. I'm going to leave this conversation right here before I say something we will both regret." She spun on her heel and retreated to the refresher. The door slid shut behind her with seeming finality

Anger and resentment brewed together to simmer inside her. She leaned back against the sink and closed her eyes tightly, clutching those feelings, relishing them over the pain she knew would soon intrude.

His sullen, angry expression sat inside her eyes. She opened them to banish it and the hard, furious knot in her stomach slowly began to unclench, thawing and allowing the ache to seep in. She tried to hold onto her anger, but it was drifting away and the tears now threatened.

Blinking them back, she decided she would not let his foul mood affect her so. It was just an argument, she told herself. Their love was still new and they were still getting used to living together, sharing a life.

She pushed away her insecurities, secretly hoping they were just that. After a quick shower, she dressed hurriedly, and gathered her things. On her way out, she noticed the comm station was blinking a message.

It was a written message and it was from Han. With a nervous intake of breath, she pulled it up on the screen.

 _I'm sorry. I love you._

The pent-up breath sighed from her, relief flooding like air released from an overblown balloon. She sent a message back to him.

 _I'm sorry, too and I love you._

It was just an argument, after all. It was normal for couples to argue, she reasoned with herself. Especially with the extreme tempers they were both capable of, she smiled.

Feeling much better, Leia left the apartment and headed to her meeting.


	5. Chapter 5: Resigned

Thank you for continuing to read and especially for all the kind reviews :)

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Sitting up in bed, Leia reviewed the file on her datapad, finding it hard to focus. With Han away on his mission with the Pathfinders, she had been working very late hours. What reason was there to rush home?

The result was exhaustion that brought her back the days of the Rebellion when sleep so often eluded her. With Han at her side, her ability to sleep had greatly improved. When he was gone, she slept fitfully at best.

Eyes at half-mast, she hovered between forging ahead and succumbing to sleep. A sudden noise jolted her wide awake. Someone was in the apartment.

Sleep forgotten, she slid from the bed and retrieved her blaster from the drawer of the nearby table. Her heart was thudding hard in her chest, adrenaline flowing through her veins. She took cover on the other side of the bed and held the blaster aimed at the door, finger on the trigger.

Her eyebrows were narrowed above dark eyes that waited patiently. When the door opened, she was both shocked and chagrined to find Han standing in the doorway. As she slumped in relief against the side of the bed, his eyes scanned the room and finally found her.

"Whoa!" he exclaimed, hands raising defensively.

She sighed deeply as the adrenaline flooded from her, leaving her more exhausted than before. "Gods, Han, you scared the hell out of me."

"Sorry, we got back early and I didn't have a chance to comm you." His hands lowered. He looked quite a bit as she had last seen him, wearing only his uniform pants and shirt. His hair was a bit longer, the only evidence that time had passed.

Leia tossed the blaster aside and climbed to kneel on the bed. It was so good to see him, she wanted him beside her. "Come here," she implored softly.

His expression grew serious. "We need to talk."

Sudden dread flitted through her and memories of the argument they had before his departure rained down on her.

"Okay…," she said slowly.

His mouth screwed up to one side and he seemed to gather his courage. "I can't do this anymore."

An ice cold shock of panic gripped her, quickly settling in her stomach. "What?" Had she even said that aloud? Her darkest fear was that one day, Han would tell her that he missed his freedom and was leaving. She cleared her throat. "Don't you think we should discuss this before you make a hasty decision?" She was impressed by how steady her voice sounded.

"It's already done."

She felt the blood drain from her face and her throat went dry. She forced the next words from her lips. "What do you mean, it's already done?"

The lines around his eyes tightened as he gave her a questioning look. "What do you think I'm talking about?"

She swallowed around the hard, dusty lump in her throat. She couldn't begin to find words, only opened her mouth to no sound.

Han was still staring at her, uncomprehending. A long moment passed and time seemed to stop. Then realization dawned and his face relaxed to an almost-smile. A soft breath sighed from his mouth and he came forward to where she kneeled on the bed, feeling as if her heart had ceased beating for an endless time.

"Did you think I was talking about us?" he asked with soft wonder.

The tension in her chest began to ease but did not disappear. Her eyes lowered and she felt suddenly silly and embarrassed. "I-." She couldn't think of a thing to say.

He kneeled on the bed, facing her. His hand buried into the mountain of her unbound hair and he gently tipped her head to look at him.

Feeling more vulnerable than she had ever felt before, she stared up at him, eyes wide, mouth open. "I'm sorry," she whispered, throat still tight.

His thumb stroked her cheek and his eyes had darkened to a serious brown. "For what?" he asked tenderly.

"Assuming the worst." She resisted the urge to look away from his scrutiny.

A small smile curved the corners of his mouth. "Sweetheart, I could never leave you," he said softly. He leaned down and kissed her, long, slow, delicious. His lashes lowered as he gazed into her eyes.

Slowly, she came back to herself. "What is it that you were talking about?"

His expression dimmed, grew cautious. "I resigned my commission," he answered with a sigh.

Her brow rose in surprise and it took her a moment to recover from this news. He had not mentioned that resigning had been on his mind. "Okay," she finally replied slowly. "When did you decide to do that?"

"Yesterday."

She took stock of his expression. He was serious, but his eyes held a touch of doubt. "What led to this decision?" Leia needed facts. It helped her figure out her own feelings.

Reluctantly, he began to speak and it finally poured out in a rush. "I'm tired of seeing so much death. I'm tired of fighting. And I don't like being away from you all the time." He paused, lips pursed for a moment. "It was different when it was for the Rebellion. There weren't a lot of leaders. But now, the military's gotten bigger. What do they need me for?"

She nodded, fully understanding. "How did Ackbar take it?"

"Hard to say. Those big eyes always look surprised to me." He tried out a small smile.

Her stern eyes were accompanied by a small, knowing smile.

He ran his hands across her shoulders and dropped his suddenly serious gaze. "You're not mad?"

"Of course not. I don't want you to do something that makes you unhappy."

The relief in his smile was obvious. He landed an all-too-brief kiss on her lips.

Looking at him curiously, she asked, "What will you do now?"

"I don't know." He looked bewildered. "I haven't thought that far ahead."

Leia had fallen seamlessly into footsteps she had walked before. Han and Luke still searched for the path to their destiny. She supposed she was lucky.

Han dropped his hands from her shoulders and placed his head on the pillow. He held his arms out to her.

Basking in his presence, she laid her head against his chest and reached to take his hand in hers. They resided with their own thoughts for several minutes, her fingers stroking his palm.

"I left my uniform jacket in Ackbar's office." The smile was clear in his voice. "I'd have left the whole damned uniform if I felt like coming back here naked."

The thought sparked a drop of laughter inside her. "This isn't Ord Mantell, you know."

"I know. That's why I came home with clothes on."

 _Home._ She loved having a home with him. The heavy haze of sleep began to settle over her as she relaxed fully against his warmth. If she had been tired before, she was exhausted now. Too much excitement for one evening. His hand caressed a path up and down her arm, edging her towards sleep.

"Thank you for understanding," he said quietly.

A flicker of surprise warred against her drifting mind. "Of course I understand." He squeezed her in his arms and she gave him a slight squeeze back.

"It's a relief to be done. Everyone says I only got the General's rank cause of you, anyway."

She frowned. "Who says that?"

His shrug bounced her away from sleep just a bit. "People."

"What people?"

"Just people."

Her mouth twisted grimly. "Well, anyone who says that clearly doesn't know you."

"I don't care," he said dismissively, as if it were obvious.

"Well, I do."

"Why?" he asked, as if she were crazy.

She wanted to lift her head to look at him but it felt too heavy. "Because I don't want to be credited with your accomplishments. That's not fair to you."

"Sweethear—." He paused and let out a huge yawn. "It doesn't matter. I've never cared what anyone thinks." He sat up, forcing her to move away for a moment, and hit the panel by the bed that turned off the illuminators. The room was doused in darkness and he laid back down, Leia resuming her position on his chest. "You shouldn't care either," he added, replacing his arms around her. "Besides, my 'accomplishments' aren't that impressive."

Her eyebrows lowered. "Of course they are."

He huffed a derisive breath. "Yeah, sure. I'm surprised they didn't make Threepio a General."

She stifled a laugh that became a yawn. "That would be quite a sight. But, seriously, I've always said you were a natural leader."

"Maybe. But, I only led when there was no one else to do it. Otherwise, you know me. Every man for himself."

She had thought that motto had been left behind on Hoth. Then again, he had spent most of his life as a loner. It was enough that he embraced her with unflagging loyalty. She couldn't expect him to give up who he was. "Regardless, you were very good at it."

"I know."

She rolled her eyes to the ceiling. Silence settled and Leia felt her eyelids being drawn down, her breath growing slow and steady. She could feel Han's heart beating steadily against her ear and it soothed her towards the clouded current of sleep.

"I love you," she said in a low susurration.

"I love you, too." The comforting words vibrated in his chest and she sighed through her nose, feelings of peace allowing her mind to dull and blur to a deep slumber.


	6. Chapter 6: Worries

It's update day! Thank you for all the great reviews, they make my day! :) Hope you like this chapter!

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"I'm very worried."

Han had come home to find Leia trying to relax in the bath. Now, he sat on the side of the tub, listening to her anxieties. "It won't happen," he reassured.

Leia's lips pressed together grimly. "It just might. Mon is certain that decreasing the size of the military is the right move."

He was momentarily distracted by the half-moons of her breasts bobbing above the water. The stirring in his loins made it difficult to force his attention back to the topic at hand, but he wrenched his gaze to her eyes. "She'll never be able to sway enough Senators to her side."

"I certainly hope not." Her hard eyes stared coldly up through the skylight in the slanted roof. Tension held her in rigid form.

"C'mere," Han beckoned, trying not to betray his ulterior motive. He patted the side of the semi-circular tub.

With a pinched expression, she glanced up at him distractedly. Thoughtlessly, she slid forward, spun around, and leaned with her back to him. Han began firmly kneading her taut shoulders.

"Cutting the military leaves us wide open," she continued. "The factions left from the Empire are small, but if they banded together, if they grew in numbers…Mmm, that feels good." She shifted and drew forward a bit, allowing him access to her upper back. He lowered his thumbs and rounded them into the tightness there. She was silent for a minute, allowing the tension to drain under his strong fingers.

A long sigh escaped her before she locked back onto her target. "It would be such a terrible decision."

"I'm telling you," Han said gently. "It'll never happen."

She sighed again and angled her neck to one side. Han slid his fingers up and began to massage her neck. "Fighting the Empire was almost easier than navigating the Senate has become."

"I always did hate politicians," he said with a hint of a sneer in his voice.

Her head turned to plant a withering glare in his direction. "Excuse me?"

He could tell her reaction was mock serious and he leaned down near her ear. "Except for the beautiful ones, like you."

One corner of her mouth curled into a half-smile. "Nice save."

"I try." He winked.

Leia chuckled lightly and Han was pleased that she was starting to relax. She turned back again and he continued the massage.

"I understand her point. Palpatine amassed a huge military for offensive purposes. She doesn't want that to happen again. But, we need to be able to defend ourselves."

He ran her words through his mind. "I guess she's thinkin' about the Chancellors that'll come after her. She knows she won't use the military to be a dictator. But, who's to say the next one won't."

She tensed instantly under his deft touch. "Why are you taking her side?"

 _Women,_ Han thought with a roll of his eyes. "I'm not taking her side. I still think it's a terrible idea. I'm just following her line of thinking."

She relaxed slightly, but not completely.

"I'm gonna get you a glass of wine to help you relax."

Another, softer sigh drifted from her lips. "I'll meet you in the bedroom."

As he left the refresher, he heard the gush of her standing from the water. He wound his way to the kitchen, reconsidering the idea of broaching the topic he had planned for this evening. Perhaps it was not the best time to tell her he had decided what to do with his time now that he had resigned his commission. He wasn't sure how she would receive the news.

He grabbed a bottle of wine and a glass from the cabinet. After opening the bottle and pouring the wine, he placed the bottle on the table. With last minute inspiration, he grabbed it again and brought it into the bedroom. It seemed like this evening might call for more than one glass of wine.

Leia was just pulling a short, white sleep shirt over her head when Han entered. He watched as it fell past her hips in a sweep. She turned to him and began to unthread her braids. When he placed the wine bottle and glass on the table near the bed, her hands stilled their frantic unbraiding.

"None for you?"

"Nah," he said as he removed his shirt. "You're the one who had a rough day." He tossed his shirt in the corner. Her eyes followed the shirt's path then narrowed as her hands returned to undoing the braids, but she refrained from commenting. "My days aren't that exciting lately." He dropped his pants, swiped her glass from the table, and got in bed to lean back against the pillows.

Her hands continued to move swiftly through her hair. "Well, at least you've had the chance to repair everything you ever wanted to fix on the Falcon." With the last braid undone, she ran her hands through her hair and tossed it from side to side.

"Yeah, we've cleaned her up quite a bit."

"I never thought I would say this, but you might just run out of things to fix." She teased a smile in his direction.

He smiled back, words he was uncertain of hanging from his parted lips. Leia seemed much more relaxed when she climbed onto the bed and took the wine glass from his hand. He had learned, not too long ago, that sometimes it was best to listen and just let her vent.

"When everything's up to spec, I don't know what I'll do with myself."

"I'm a little surprised you haven't come up with some ideas yet."

He hesitated. "Well…" he began slowly. "There is something I've been kickin' around."

She took a slow sip of her wine. "What's that?"

He wondered suddenly why he hadn't gotten a glass of wine for himself. It was too late to turn back now… "I was thinkin'…just a thought. Of maybe becoming a racing pilot." His breath held.

The glass froze on its way to her mouth and her eyes widened. "You're serious?"

With a small shrug, he nodded. "Well, yeah."

After several quick blinks, she took a long swallow from her glass. "What brought on that idea?" She was unreadable.

"I really miss flying. And you know, I love being faster than the next guy, which I always am." He paused and flashed a smug grin, which only earned him a half-hearted eye roll. "I kind of just wanna do something fun, nothing too serious. I've had enough serious."

Leia studied him for a long, drawn-out moment that seemed endless. "It will still take you away from Chandrilla."

"Yeah, but it'll be on my terms." He raised his chin confidently. "I only go when I decide."

She downed the last of her wine, turned to reach across and place the glass on the bedside table. When she spun back to him, she gave him a small, benevolent smile. "If that's what you want to do, then do it. I don't ever want you to be unhappy or feel stuck in this life here."

He grinned from ear to ear but was quickly hit by a wave of confusion. "What do you mean, stuck? Why would I feel stuck?"

Her eyes lowered and she placed a hand beneath the sheet covering his legs. Her thumb stroked his knee absentmindedly. Her mouth opened a moment before her hesitant voice followed. "I just know that you're used to your freedom. You haven't stayed in one place for long…" Her eyes remained averted. "And I feel like…there may come a time when…" She shrugged slightly. "You won't want to stay in one place anymore."

A fierce protectiveness rushed him, a desire to protect her heart, to reassure her. A small smile turned up his lips and he reached a gentle hand under her chin to tip her gaze to his. Her eyes were vulnerable, poised for any response he might give. "Leia," he said softly. "I wanna be wherever you are. Think about it. I stayed with the Rebellion for three years on the off chance you might give me the time of day."

She smiled cautiously but it didn't catch her eyes.

He continued speaking in a soft, comforting tone. "The whole reason I resigned my commission was cause I didn't want to be away so much."

She sighed. "I just worry that you'll get bored here, that you'll miss running around the galaxy and doing whatever you want to."

"Well, don't worry about that." He swept a hand to push at the curtain of hair that partially obscured her beauty. "I think racing is the perfect solution. I can go off every once in a while, fly fast, win races, then come home to you." She appeared unconvinced, so he said words that he had never expected to say to anyone. "Leia." One hand was buried in her hair and his eyes blazed into hers. " _You_ are my home."

The sudden blink of tears in her eyes surprised him. But, she was smiling so he figured it had been the right thing to say.

When she spoke, her voice was low and tight. "You know, for a nerfherder, you say some pretty sweet things sometimes."

He could feel the answering smile exploding across his face. Never before would he have believed someone could light him up from the inside like this.


	7. Chapter 7: Jitters

Time for some major, life changing events to occur!

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Han Solo rarely felt nervous. But, right now, he felt as if a scatter of nesting flies flitted inside his stomach, tickling his insides with their light, feathery wings.

As a very young child, with no family to speak of, Han had imagined growing up and having a family of his own. Over time, that dream had dimmed and then died as he became aware of the harsh reality that no one could be trusted and it was best to keep everyone at a distance. The man he was today wouldn't even have recognized the naïve, dreaming boy of long ago.

Now, much to his surprise, Leia had changed the game on him. After being released from carbonite, Han had known that Leia was his future. Beyond that, he had given no thought to what might be in store for them. He wasn't one to think ahead. Marriage hadn't been a notion. What was the point? He didn't need to get married to seal his commitment to Leia.

Lately, however, the idea of marrying Leia had been lingering at the forefront of his mind. It had first sparked on the night he informed her that he wanted to be a racing pilot. That night was one of several times she had expressed a fear that he would leave her. It made him want to prove his commitment to her. His words did not seem to be enough to banish her fears.

Hand in his pocket, he clasped the globe-shaped box that held the ring he was prepared to present to her. A flicker of old anxieties scuttled through him, increasing the pace of the wings flitting through his stomach.

His heart confidently informed him that Leia would accept his proposal. His brain was not quite as certain. It whispered doubts into the deepest recesses of his mind. Feelings of inadequacy from the not-so-distant past muddled him. She was still a Princess, after all, and he still had nothing to offer beyond his love and unflagging loyalty.

But, she loved him. He knew that. And so, he pushed aside his doubts, took a long, deep breath, and headed into the building that was their home. In the lift, he pulled the globe from his pocket.

It was painted with the blue, green, and white swirl that was the topography of Alderaan. He clicked the box open and examined the ring inside.

The band of the ring was covered in clear gems and spiraled up in a unique pattern around a large, round stone of very light, clear blue. Han had been drawn to it immediately and had used almost all of the credits he had just won in his first race.

He had planned a perfect night out for them, in the guise of celebrating his win. As the evening came to a close, he would surprise her with the ring.

At the door, he took a deep breath before punching in the entry code. With a casual smile, he swept inside and called her name.

Nothing.

He tried again, more loudly. Still nothing. He checked each room before finally admitting she wasn't there.

He was disappointed. She had insisted she would be there when he arrived home. With a sigh, he resigned himself to the fact that something at the office had clearly held her up. He decided to shower and change while he waited.

Once showered, he spun through his wardrobe. Deeming it a special occasion, he decided on a shirt that Leia had purchased for him, but he had never worn. It was black across the shoulders and down the sleeves, torso plain white. He paired it with black pants, neatly tucking the shirt in. He placed the ring box in his pocket and finished the outfit with a pair of his less-worn black boots.

Standing before the reflector, he acknowledged that it was not his style, but Leia would probably like it. He noticed the bulge of the box in his pocket and readjusted it so that it was less noticeable.

Checking the chrono, he was mildly irritated that she had still not arrived. He trekked into the main room, sat on the sofa, and turned on the holonet to watch the news.

After checking the chrono countless times, Han finally heard the door swish open, and there was Leia, dressed for business, a hard angry look on her face.

Her eyes landed on him. "It's happening." Her voice was like durasteel.

Puzzled, he stared up at her, eyebrows narrowed in confusion, mouth poised in a silent question.

She didn't wait for him to ask it. "Mon proposed the Military Disarmament Act."

Han's face fell. He knew how strongly Leia opposed this idea. And he agreed that it was a mistake. He stood from the sofa and went to stand before her, taking her hands in his with a sigh. "I'm sorry, Sweetheart."

She continued as if he hadn't spoken. "After everything we've been through, she's going to risk the freedom we've won. I can't take it." She was livid.

"Maybe it will get voted down," he suggested in a gentle tone.

"It was well received. The vote is next week." Her head bent and her eyes lowered. "It's not as if I don't understand her reasoning. But, it's too much of a risk. Particularly now. We finally have peace, I want it to stay that way."

"Well, with the Galactic Concordance—"

She cut him off sharply. "I don't trust the dregs of the Empire!"

Han struggled for soothing words. "I don't trust them either. But, maybe now that the war is over, they've realized there's no fight left."

"Ninety percent, Han! She's cutting the military by ninety percent!"

A cold shock flew through him. Leia was right to be worried. "That's..." He searched for an adequate word. "Extreme."

"It's crazy, that's what it is."

He couldn't disagree. At a loss, he pulled her into his arms, but the tension in her small form held her rigid. She let out a deep breath then closed her arms around him.

"What're you gonna do?"

The anger in her voice dimmed but the fire and determination remained. "I'm going to oppose it. I have to sway more Senators against it. Hostis Ij already spoke against it publicly, much to Mon's dismay."

It took a moment for Han to recall who Ij was, but he finally remembered him as one of Mon Mothma's aides. Leia stepped back to look up at him, suddenly noticing his attire. Her eyes glanced over him from head to toe.

"Oh, Han, I almost forgot about our night out. I don't know if I'm up to it."

He kept his expression impassive, but his nerves rattled. He needed to do this tonight. It had been planned for too long and he couldn't take the suspense another day. Appealing to her softer side, he crooned, "Aw, Sweetheart, I've been waiting all week to take you out. C'mon, let's get your mind off all this and focus on us." He rarely played the guilt card, but the stakes were high tonight.

Her expression turned remorseful. "I'm sorry. I didn't even welcome you back or congratulate you on your win." She sighed. "I'm just so upset."

This was hardly the first time that her anger and worry had obscured all else and Han thought nothing of it. "Feel free to make up for it now," he said quietly, a hint of seduction in his voice. She smiled for the first time and when he leaned down to kiss her, she kissed him back although he could tell her mind was still preoccupied. He pulled her to him so that the length of her body pressed against his and his tongue pushed gently between her lips to dance with hers. He kissed her with the leashed passion that suddenly pounded through him. In that moment, he knew he wanted to marry her, and not just to ease her fears, but to possess her entirely, to know that she was his in every way.

The tension slowly faded from her body as she yielded to him, her tongue moving slickly against his, and he felt her hips press sensuously against him.

When the kiss finally broke, she gazed up with eyes that were now only for him. "Welcome home," she whispered.

"Good to be back," he rumbled quietly, pressing his sudden hardness to meet her growing passion.

"Maybe we should stay in tonight."

Her finger traced his lower lip and Han felt himself grow harder. But, he had a plan for tonight and he had to see it through. "Hey, we've got all night. Let's go to dinner first."

"Okay, I'll go shower and get changed." She remained in his arms, hands running over his biceps.

"We missed our reservations. I'll see what else we can get."

Tiny wrinkles creased her brow. "Oh, I'm sorry. It's my fault."

He placed a quick kiss on her lips. "It's fine. We'll go someplace else." Holding her at arms' length, he spun her towards the hallway leading to the bedroom, and smacked her lightly on the behind. "Now, go get dressed, Princess."

She startled at the light slap and started forward, smiling playfully at him over her shoulder. Hands on his hips, he watched her with an appreciative smile as she swayed an exaggerated wiggle of her hips.

Han let out a long breath, gearing up for the big moment.


	8. Chapter 8: Waylaid

Thank you all for reading, following, and reviewing! :) Every review makes my day a little brighter!

And, here we go...

###

"It's fine, really."

Glumly, Han glowered before taking a bite of his sandwich.

"It's my fault, not yours," Leia added. Unable to get last minute reservations to a nicer restaurant, they had settled on a small hole-in-the-wall that had the best sandwiches in Hanna City. Smoky, exotic spices filled the bright air between tables that were too close together. Han was uncharacteristically disappointed. "You're not usually one for fancy places," she remarked between chews.

A flicker of unease hit his eyes for just a moment. "I just wanted us to have a nice night out," he grumbled.

"And we are." She leaned forward and ran her eyes over him. "You look so handsome."

He sat up a bit straighter and a twinkle lit his eyes. His gaze appraised her in kind, lingering at the round valley of her cleavage. "You look…" He sighed through his nose. "Amazing."

His initial reaction to the short, white, gauzy dress had filled Leia with satisfaction. Mouth held open for a moment, he had deemed her breathtaking. Under his enthralled gaze, all of her self-perceived flaws fell away. He never failed to make her feel as beautiful as she had been told she was during her life as a princess. Whereas, the words of others seemed obligatory, Han's reactions were genuine and heartfelt.

His hand covered hers across the table and they smiled into each other's eyes. A sudden, loud crash jolted them from the moment and they both looked up.

A server had dropped a tray of dishes and the other beings in the eatery applauded and cheered. Leia returned her gaze to Han and rolled her eyes with a small smile that he returned amidst the sounds of clinking shards of dishes.

"I'm glad we came out tonight. I needed this. _We_ needed this."

His smile was pleased and, as he downed the last of his sandwich, her eyes traced the broad lines of his shoulders, accentuated by the thick, black stripe at the top of his shirt. His head turned to one side and she watched him in profile, his strong jaw, slightly off-center nose, his full mouth. She had never found another man so beautiful.

She leaned closer to him and spoke in a low whisper. "Hey."

His eyes quickly returned to hers.

"Let's go home after this. I need to get you out of those fancy clothes."

The brown-green of his eyes darkened with passion and one side of his mouth curved up slightly. "Isn't that my line?"

"Well, tonight it's mine." She brushed her fingers lightly over his, flashing him a promising smile.

His eyes remained intently on hers. After a moment, his expression cleared. "Not just yet. I have some other plans for tonight."

Her eyebrows rose in surprise. "Really? You're passing up an opportunity for me to take you to bed?"

His grin slanted to one side. "Not passing up, just…delaying gratification."

Laughter bubbled inside her at his choice of words, but she kept her lips pressed together, even while the corners arced upwards. "I always thought of you as an instant gratification kind of man."

His grin broadened. "Sometimes there's something to be said for letting the anticipation build."

At the moment, all Leia wanted to do was push him down on the table and climb on top of him.

He gestured towards her plate. "You done?"

She had completely forgotten about the half sandwich that was left. "Yes. So, what's next on your agenda?"

He grinned confidently. "You'll see."

###

Jostled from all sides, Leia found a great deal of amusement in the exasperated expression on Han's face. He turned to face her amidst the throng of beings that was squeezed tightly into the club. Over the wild, pounding music, she could not hear him when he spoke.

"What?!" she shouted back.

He yelled louder and she could hear his voice but still could not make out the words. She shook her head at him with a slight smile. His eyes rolled to the heavens and he grabbed her hand, tugging her back towards the exit. It was a slow crawl as he attempted to squeeze through the drunken crowd.

From outside, the music had been inaudible and Leia assumed they must have an excellent silencer. She had been surprised when he said he was taking her dancing. It was doubtful that Crush music was what he'd had in mind.

When they finally spilled outside and the door was closed, the sudden silence was halting, as if an earthquake had just ceased and they were reclaiming their equilibrium.

Shaking his head, Han looked down at her. "I had no idea it was going to be like that."

"I had a feeling," she replied dryly.

"Sorry. This night isn't going as planned."

She drew closer to him and smiled sweetly, craning her neck to look into his eyes. "It is for me. I'm with you."

His features softened and a small smile struck. He leaned down to kiss her softly. "Well, I have one more surprise tonight."

"Yet another?" she whispered.

"Yeah." A slight grimace marred his smile. "And I promise it'll be better than the others."

"You're more of a romantic than I realized."

He winked. "Don't spread it around."

###

Han tried to console himself over his plans for the evening. Dinner and dancing had been an unromantic failure, but the most important part was still to come.

He stepped out of their hovercar and motioned for Leia to stay in place. Walking around to her side, he opened the door for her.

One of her eyebrows jostled playfully. "Such a gentleman. Are you a biobot that has secretly taken Han Solo's place?"

He held out his hand to help her from the vehicle. She took it and rose from the seat, hand still in his. He kissed it and looked up at her through his lashes. "Why don't you examine my body more closely and find out."

"Oh, I plan to."

He closed the door, placed his arm around her waist and steered her from the hovercar, through the arched fence, and onto the sandy beach. He wondered if she, too, was recalling memories from more than a year ago.

Pulling her closer, he spoke quietly into her hair. "Remember the last time we were on a beach?"

"Ord Mantell." He could hear the smile in her voice.

"Yeah. This time I'll have the nerve to kiss you."

She chuckled softly. "You had better."

"You didn't make things easy for me."

"I thought Han Solo liked a challenge."

He smirked. "A challenge? The Kessel Run was a challenge. You were…well, let's put it this way: you made the Kessel Run look like child's play."

She smiled knowingly. "Some say you cheated at the Kessel Run."

He stopped, appalled. "Who says that?"

She shrugged and tugged him along. "People."

"Look!" he cried indignantly, as he fell back into step beside her. "Chewie was there. You can ask him…" He trailed off at the teasing glint in her eye. Chagrined at being caught out so easily, he smiled. "Aw, I get it."

She snickered softly.

He put both arms around her and pulled her close then kissed the top of her head. "So, you were just challenging me?" he asked in a softer tone.

"Oh, no, of course not. You were insufferable. I kept trying to get rid of you." She smiled sweetly. "But, you wouldn't go away."

He grinned down at her. "That's cause you kept giving me those 'fuck me' eyes."

She struggled against sputtering laughter. "Somehow, I don't remember that."

"It was involuntary. You couldn't help it." He kept his tone matter-of-fact. "I have that effect on women."

"Oh, really? How many women give you 'fuck me' eyes?" One brow rose.

He shrugged. "I don't know, it happens all the time." He sighed. "It's a curse. Yesterday it was Mon Mothma."

Now, Leia stopped walking and doubled over laughing, leaving Han's arms in the process. "Gods, I would love to see that!" She laughed again.

He joined her with a quiet chuckle.

She stopped laughing, but a smirk still lingered. "I think you're mistaking 'fuck me' eyes with rolling one's eyes. Now _that_ effect you definitely have on women."

He nodded to her and smiled. "Cute." They gazed into each other's eyes for a moment and he placed a hand to cup her cheek before leaning down to kiss her. Her tongue at his lips obliterated all jokes from his mind and his body responded instantly. Their tongues intermingled for a time until their lips pressed together lingeringly and broke the kiss. Eyes closed, Han's breath stuck for a second and he recalled why he had actually brought her here. His thoughts drifted and anxiety churned his stomach again.

He was even more nervous than he had been that long ago night on Ord Mantell. This time, the stakes were higher. It was not just a simple necklace he was giving her. The ring meant he was giving her his heart in its entirety…she would either accept it and cherish it, or shatter it with her bare hands.

He told himself he was being dramatic. She loved him. But did she love him enough to make a lifetime commitment to him?

He stepped away and dropped down to the sand to remove his boots. She watched him with a smile and he paused and indicated she join him. Without a word, she sat delicately beside him and removed her shoes.

He stood then pulled her up to join him. Hand in hand, they walked to the edge of the water, their feet marking the damp sand. Leia's head tipped to the sky and he admired her in the moonlight.

Never had he thought someone could make him feel so much, could fill him to bursting with so many emotions. She had made his heart soft, something he had guarded against forever. Never before had it felt so tender, so vulnerable, as right now.

"I was nervous that night," he confessed.

Hand holding onto his arm as they walked, she looked up at him in surprise. "Why?"

Warm water rose and lapped at their feet, dragging back the sand beneath them. "Cause I planned to give you the necklace."

Her hand went to the dangling, blue and green jewels at her throat. "And that made you nervous?" she asked with a smile.

"Yeah," he snorted. "I didn't know how you'd react." His hand shoved into his pants pocket and he spun the small box with deft fingers.

"How did you think I would react?"

He stopped walking, Leia halting beside him, and turned to face her, a fierce double thump jumping from his chest into his throat. He swallowed hard and breathed deeply. "I don't know. At the time…"

"You don't know?" She was smiling, eyes sparkling.

"I guess now I know." He smiled slightly, glanced down at the sand then returned to gaze at her intently. "Didn't know so much then."

A sudden question lit her eyes and she looked puzzled. "Is something wrong?"

His mouth went dry and he swallowed again, trying to find his voice. He realized he was gripping the box in his pocket too hard.

"Leia…" he croaked, unable to find the words he had carefully chosen.

An abrupt sprinkle spattered across his nose. Leia made a soft, startled noise as the mist increased to a drizzle. Thunder roared in the distance and Han's heart slunk to his stomach. He squinted his eyes up to the sky in disbelief.

Leia's eyes were also slits against the rain. "The hovercar," she said urgently.

"Blast all!" he swore. He took off at a run, his disappointment much harsher than his concern for the open hovercar. When he reached it, he hit the controls to close the top. By the time it was closed and he opened the door, Leia had reached him, carrying their shoes. She ducked inside and closed her door.

The rain began to fall faster, and for a moment, Han just stood, becoming steadily drenched and damning his luck.


	9. Chapter 9: Mishap

I am updating a day early to end the suspense of the proposal. i know cliffhangers can be tough lol. Thank you all so much for your support! :)

###

Inside their apartment, Han decided that fate must have decided he was making a mistake. His stomach had sunk to the point of nausea.

Leia had gone in the refresher to dry off and Han sat dejectedly on the small sofa in the bedroom. He was barely aware of his damp clothes.

Every single thing had gone wrong tonight. He couldn't help but take it as a sign. What was supposed to be a perfect night had turned disastrous.

When had he come to believe in signs, or fate? With a grimace, he decided it was Leia and Luke's fault.

Leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, he placed his face in his hands and sighed with disgust. What had he been thinking? Why would Leia want to marry him? He had nothing to offer her. It would only take time for her to realize that fact.

Perhaps it was best this way. He was being spared that moment of rejection. And how awkward would it be, being together day after day when she had turned him down? Surely, it would drive a wedge between them. And that was the last thing he wanted. No, it was best that things remain as they were.

But, that realization did not dispel the misery that weighed him down like an Imperial ship into the sinking fields of Jakku.

The swish of the refresher door dragged his attention from his lamentation. Han looked up to see Leia walking into the room, naked.

"Why are you still sitting in your wet clothes?" She sounded surprised.

He became suddenly aware of the fact that he was, indeed, sitting in his wet clothing, the dampness seeping into the fabric of the sofa. "He forced a small smile. "Just waiting for the fresher."

She gave him an odd look then tossed her towel at him. He caught it deftly and rubbed it through his drying hair. Leia padded to the vanity across the room and grabbed her brush, running it through her endlessly long, wet hair.

After watching her for a moment, heart heavy, Han stood, unfastened his shirt, removed it, and dropped it to the floor. He ran the towel across his arms and torso then dropped it on the sofa. Without thinking, he dropped his pants as well. With a heavy thud and a long roll, the round box fell from his pocket, travelled across the floor, and landed with a bump against Leia's left foot.

Time stopped and Han froze. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as Leia's eyes were drawn down to the small box by her foot. He didn't know what to do, standing there, suddenly feeling as naked as his body was.

Leia seemed to stare down at the box for an endless time. Finally, she frowned, replaced the brush on the vanity, and bent to retrieve the sphere from the floor. Crouching low, she examined it before looking up at Han with a puzzled expression.

"This is Alderaan." Her voice was filled with surprised wonder.

His breath caught and he couldn't speak, so he just nodded.

She stood, turning the globe over in her hands, eyes roaming across the familiar landscape. Slowly, eyes still on the box, she walked to stand in front of him.

Han's mind struggled for a way to salvage the moment. Generally a master of impetuous reactions, he was surprised to find his thoughts blank.

Her eyes found him and they were as solemn as his own. "Is this for me?"

He nodded again, swallowing against feelings of dread.

Her head tipped slightly to one side, questioning. "When were you going to give it to me?"

He cleared his throat loudly and forced himself to answer. "Tonight," he replied lamely. His eyes fell to the box before returning to hers. "I just…didn't find the right moment."

A small, heartfelt smile drew her lips upwards. She examined it again before gazing at him. "Can I open it?"

Could he possibly say no? After a moment of hesitation, he nodded, defeated and resigned.

He watched as her hands went with deliberate movements to both sides of the box. His heart throbbed in a swift staccato pattern and he suppressed the impulsive urge to grab the box and run.

It seemed forever before she lifted the top of the box from the bottom and finally, there was the ring, sparkling, seeming to taunt him with its brightness.

His mind buzzed and he was dimly aware of the way her mouth shaped to a shocked "o," but no sound emerged. For an instant, nothing happened. It seemed as if they would remain in that moment for eternity.

Then, her eyes were wide and staring at him and the only expression he could decipher was shock. He swallowed hard.

She blinked sharply several times. "Is this…what I think it is?" she asked breathlessly.

Forcing his eyes to remain on hers, he nodded shortly. An infinite amount of time passed where they just stared at each other and Han waited for her to respond with awkward excuses, his heart precariously perched in her hands.

Abruptly, her eyes filled with tears that confused him utterly. He was lost for what to do.

Through her tears, a small smile appeared. "Aren't you going to ask me?"

It took a moment for her words to register, and when they did, his mouth dropped open and a burst of joy flooded him, inspiring slight tears of relief in his own eyes.

The moment became surreal, both standing there, completely naked, the open box in her hands. Slowly, hesitantly, he took the box from her and tried to decide what to do next. He finally lowered himself to one knee, dropped the top of the box to the floor, and held up the lower half with the ring shining brightly inside it.

"Leia…" His voice was tight with emotion. He took a deep breath. "Will you marry me?"

A few scant tears fell from her eyes and her smile grew radiant. "Yes. Yes, Han. I will marry you."

She held out a trembling hand and he slipped the ring on her finger, grinning as broadly as she was. She stared at it, lips quivering through her smile. Then, she dropped to her knees in front of him, took his face in her hands, and pulled him to her for the most beautiful kiss of Han's life.


	10. Chapter 10: Aftershock

Did someone ask how they celebrated? ;)

###

Lying naked together on the sofa, they stared into each other's eyes until Leia slowly shook her head.

"I still can't believe you asked me to marry you," she said quietly, tracing his lower lip with a gentle finger.

He grinned crookedly, tender emotions still bursting, like fading fireworks in his chest. "I still can't believe you said yes."

Her finger halted and her brow drew downwards. "You doubted me?"

Sheepish, his lips pursed to one side. "Well, I didn't know…" He dropped his gaze.

"You know I love you, don't you?" she asked softly, finger drifting to the scar smattered across his chin.

"Yeah." Discomfort flitted through him. "I know that." He avoided her gaze, bringing his own to stare at the ceiling while his hands traced a lazy trail up and down the smooth skin of her back. "Doesn't mean you wanted to get married."

Her arms went around him and she snuggled closer, head resting against his chest, hair engulfing him. "You can be such a nerfherder." She sighed contentedly against his chest.

"So you've said," he replied dryly.

"I think you underestimate me," she said wistfully. "And yourself."

Her words hit him surprisingly hard and he couldn't help but examine them further. The implication that he underestimated her made perfect sense and did not surprise him. He should have known she was as committed to him as he was to her. But, her idea that he had underestimated himself…it led him to believe that he was more transparent than he realized. And he wasn't too certain he liked that. It made him feel deeply vulnerable in a moment when he was already feeling more than he was comfortable with.

"What are you thinking about?" she murmured into his chest.

The question startled him and he quickly covered it up. "The wedding night," he distracted in a suggestive tone.

Her head rose to look at him, a smile gracing her lips. "Hmm…we should probably practice for that."

A slow grin crept across his face. "You're right. We should practice a lot. Wanna get it just right."

Leia inched her body up until her mouth was close to his. "I love you," she whispered reverently.

"I know." His tone was just as sober and it garnered a tiny smile from the woman in his arms. Memories of fear, passion, and desperation rebounded with those words, from a time when they had thought all was lost, including his life. He had meant it as a teasing joke, but it added sudden gravity to the moment.

He placed one hand behind her head and covered her mouth with his, emotion driving him as much as passion. Her mouth was immediately open and beckoning, and his tongue slid inside to stroke hers sensuously. His fingers glided lightly down her back and she shivered at the caress.

His wife. This amazing woman was going to be his wife. The thought hit him again, an unbelievable reality, and it caused a swell and constriction in his chest that felt both pleasurable and painful at the same time.

They kissed with a slow hunger, taking their time, savoring each other. Her hips pressed against him and he felt himself growing hard and eager beneath her. His hands smoothed along her buttocks, urging her closer.

Her mouth left his and trailed hot, moist kisses across his jaw, down his neck, licking her way to his clavicle. Steamy breath flew from his throat and his thoughts were obliterated by her mouth slowly streaming down his chest, tracing invisible lines.

She stopped suddenly and looked up at him. "I don't think there's enough room on this sofa for what I want to do to you," she whispered, eyes smoldering.

With a quick glance, he realized that, with his legs hanging off the end, she had nowhere to go but off the short space. She dropped to her knees beside him and tugged at his hand. A crooked grin of anticipation was strewn across his face as he lowered himself to the floor, keeping his eyes on hers. Lying on his back, he buried one hand in her hair.

"What're you gonna do to me?" His voice was hoarse with longing.

"Whatever I want." Her mouth curved and she raised her eyebrows seductively. She leaned over, kissed him deeply then returned to where she had left off at his chest.

Her tongue was light, feathery, and inflamed him to the point of sweet torment. She teased his stomach, his hip, and dove lower to the line of pubic hair at his abdomen. Flicking across that line to the other hip, her mouth travelled down his thigh and Han groaned loudly, aching for her to take him in her mouth.

It seemed an unbearable eternity as she teased him into a frenzy of desire, licking one thigh, then the other with excruciating leisure. Just when he thought he could take it no longer, her tongue drifted lightly to the tip of his hardness and he felt ready to burst.

"Leia!" he cried, panting, followed by a deep groan.

She took just the head of him into her mouth and he shuddered with pleasure. When her mouth covered him entirely, his response was loud and unbridled. With gentle suction, she moved down then away, her tongue sliding slickly from tip to base along one side of him. His hips began to move with her rhythm and noisy, shocked exhalations burst from his lips, growing louder by the moment.

For what seemed like forever, he was lost to the feeling of her mouth surrounding him, hot, wet, and clasped tightly, faster, coaxing him higher towards ecstasy.

Her hands slid beneath him and gripped his buttocks, holding him in place, and the feeling of being possessed by her was the last sensation that drove him over the edge. His hips began to spasm out of control, body tensing, prepared for sudden release, and he exploded with a strangled scream that held throughout his orgasm, as he pulsated endlessly and her hands clutched him and held him in place.

And then his body and mind collapsed and his thoughts were blank, focused only on his ragged, harsh breathing. He was faintly aware of her mouth releasing him and she raised up to lie against his chest, but he couldn't move enough to even open his eyes. Utterly weak, he was silent and mindless for some time.

When her hands began rubbing along his shoulders, he forced his arms around her.

"Gods, woman," he rasped.

She laughed lightly into his chest, her own breath calming.

"I should ask you to marry me more often," he declared, trying to catch his breath.

After a moment of silence, breath beginning to normalize, she asked, "What would have happened if the box hadn't fallen out of your pocket?"

Too exhausted to think, in a fit of stops and starts, he answered honestly. "Guess...I woulda… waited for another time. When it seemed right." It occurred to him that, although all his plans had gone awry, the most important part had been perfect. And here they were.

"You know, I didn't need some perfect moment. You asking me was perfect enough."

Her words made him smile. "So, what you're saying is, I wasted my time. We should've just stayed in, made love, and gotten engaged right here."

"Oh, you didn't waste your time." The amusement was plain in her voice. "I get to enjoy the memories of you sweating it out all night for the rest of our lives."

Strength beginning to return, Han rolled to his side, gently placing her on her back. He slung a leg over her, propped an elbow up, and rested his head in his hand. "I wasn't sweating it out," he denied hotly.

She arched one eyebrow in his direction. "Oh, really?"

He nodded defensively, lips pressed together.

"I don't know. You seemed pretty nervous when I picked up that box."

"I just wasn't prepared." He was well aware that she knew he was simply putting up a confident façade. It was a game they often played.

Turning on her side to face him, she placed her leg between both of his and mimicked his posture with her head in her hand. "Okay, Hotshot. You were never worried. You knew I would say yes."

"That's right." He tossed her a confident nod.

She bit her lip and appraised him with an affectionate gaze. "That's my scoundrel."

He rolled on top of her. "That's right," he rumbled from deep in his chest. "Time to show you just how much of a scoundrel I can be." He captured her mouth with his, skimming against her so that his chest brushed lightly against her breasts, drawing a sharp intake of breath from her. He repeated the motion, growing excited by her reaction when her head fell back and her eyes closed in dreamy concentration.

Han became lost in her body, consumed with teasing and pleasuring her, reveling in the knowledge that she would soon be _his,_ in every way.


	11. Chapter 11: Mispoken

So happy you guys liked the proposal and the celebration afterwards :) Thank you all for reading, following, and reviewing!

###

Leia sighed with dread. This was getting out of hand. Now that her engagement to Han had gone public, she received daily lists of more people that simply had to be invited. The wedding of the last Princess of Alderaan was turning into a Galactic Celebratory Nightmare.

And as the list grew longer, Han became more frustrated and angry.

Her Senatorial Aide, Scho Tuck, seemed to have his finger on the pulse of the government officials who were dictating Leia's wedding. He also seemed to be reporting back to someone, since Mon Mothma herself had sought Leia out, insisting that it was, indeed, necessary to make this wedding into the event of the century. She hadn't used those words, but her meaning was clear.

How had this become about everyone other than Han and herself? She wondered if she could keep the details from him and allow him to be surprised at the wedding. But, no, she didn't want their first order of business as a married couple to be an argument.

Leia closed the file and shut down her computer for the day. Scho had already left the office so she locked the door behind her and took a lift to the garage where her hovercar was parked. As she wound her way through the other vehicles in the space lanes, she ran over the list of changes in her mind.

At the door to the apartment, she hesitated with a sigh, then entered the access code. When the door slid open, she could hear noise from the holoplayer.

Han looked up from the couch with a smile. Cheers sounded in the background, and as he rose to greet her, she glanced at the holo.

"You're watching that again?" she asked, amazed.

He shrugged then leaned down to kiss her briefly. "Hey, I gotta remember my best moves."

She rolled her eyes, having lost count of how many times he had watched the holorecording of his win at the Abregado Prime Race.

"I think you may have reached a new level of vanity."

He flashed his most disarming grin. "Well, when you're this good…"

Leia rolled her eyes again.

"Ya know, someday you're gonna hurt yourself doing that," Han observed.

"If that was going to happen, it would have happened years ago," she countered dryly. She sauntered past him, abandoned her bag on the floor, and dropped onto the sofa with a long sigh.

"Rough day?" He sat down facing her, one arm over the back of the sofa behind her.

She nodded. "Can you shut that thing off?" The voice of the commentator was grating on her nerves.

Leaning forward, he hit a switch and the holo disintegrated. "I'm not in it anymore, anyway." He returned to his spot next to her, placed a quick kiss on her neck then nuzzled close. "I think you need a little love and affection after a long, hard day."

"Love, affection, and maybe some wine."

"You got it." He started to rise but she stayed him with a hand on his arm.

"No, don't go. Just stay here and hold me."

"That'll be my pleasure," he crooned softly, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her into his chest.

"Mmm, this feels good." She relaxed into his embrace, allowing the stress to drain away.

"So, what happened today?"

"Too much."

"More of the same?"

"Generally."

"Sorry, Sweetheart." He ran a soothing hand down her back.

"The one good thing was that I got in touch with Luke."

"Great. What'd he say?"

"He'll be here for the wedding."

"Oh, good." He sounded relieved. "Oh, that reminds me. Someone messaged from the Alderaanian Consulate."

Apprehension fluttered through her stomach. She closed her eyes in hesitation before sitting up to look at him. Her words came reluctantly. "I'm…going to have to let them know we won't be having the wedding there."

For a moment, he looked puzzled. Then, a light seemed to dawn and his expression grew leery. "Why? What is it?" She opened her mouth to reply, but he cut her off. "Do I want to know? I probably don't want to know."

"You don't want to know." Maybe they could avoid the topic altogether.

"What is it?" His expression remained grim.

Her lips pursed together before finally answering. "I had to add another hundred people to the guest list."

"A hundred…? You've gotta be kidding me!"

She gave him a strained smile and he knew the answer. He stood and began to pace the room.

"This is ridiculous! How many are we up to?"

"A little over five hundred," she answered meekly.

"Five—five hundred?" he sputtered, stopping in place and facing her with his hands on his hips. "This is insane!"

"I know."

The pacing resumed as he fumed, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. "Five hundred! We don't even know five hundred people!"

Leia sighed through her nose, allowing the tirade to play out.

He halted in place abruptly. "Why can't we just say no?"

"It's not that simple."

"How is it not that simple? It's _our_ wedding!"

"Han, whether we like it or not, we're a symbol to the galaxy."

"That's not you speaking!" His hostile finger pointed in her direction. "That's Mon Mothma."

"Okay, yes, those were her words. But—."

" _But,_ it's not her wedding! She wants some huge event to serve as a symbol to the galaxy, tell her to get married."

It was difficult to argue with him. Deep down, in the special, separate part that had carved out a small niche of a private life, Leia resented having that life offered up for the benefit of the New Republic. But, this government was what she had fought so hard for. How could she possibly refuse?

"I'm sorry, Han," she said quietly.

He began pacing again. "If I knew it was going to be this complicated I never would've even asked you."

Her blood ran cold in her veins and her mind reeled, denying she had just heard those words.

He stopped instantly and his repentant expression was immediate. His eyes had grown large and apologetic and his lips pursed to one side. "Leia, I'm sorry."

Hurt and anger constricted her throat. She didn't trust herself to respond with anything other than wounded defiance, so she spun away from him, stalked to the bedroom and locked the door behind her.

As it slid shut, she heard the desperate tinge in his voice, calling her to come back.


	12. Chapter 12: Penitent

Thank you for all the reviews :) To the guest reviewer who said they thought this was supposed to be a "happy story": Overall, this is a happy story, but all couples, even the most harmonious, have arguments and struggles. I don't think it would be realistic for every day of their lives to be blissful. But, they love each other deeply and that is what gets them through the hard times.

On the the aftermath of the argument...happy times are ahead, I promise :)

###

For the fifth time in an hour, Han knocked on the bedroom door.

"Leia, Sweetheart, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I was just pissed off." His voice was pleading. He knocked again. "Leia. Please. Open the door."

For perhaps the tenth time, he considered overriding the lock, then decided, again, that it was best not to anger her further.

It had been an idiotic thing he had said out of frustration. He hadn't meant it and would have given anything to take it back. Since that was not an option, he at least wanted to explain.

With a deep sigh, he started to turn away, but the sudden swish, as the door finally opened, flung him right back. Leia's back was retreating from the door. She was wearing her white robe and had clearly just taken a bath or shower. He guessed a bath, since her hair was dry and pulled up in a high bun.

She stood at the vanity, removing the fastenings from her hair.

"Sweetheart," he began quietly, arms open, palms up. "I didn't mean it."

The lush mass of her hair spilled past her shoulders and he could see the reflection of her taut jaw and cold eyes, defenses she always wore when shouldering hurt or resentment. He had seen that expression more often than not in the three years before they admitted their feelings for each other. Having lowered her defenses with him, it had become very rare that this barrier was again raised against him. When it was, he knew he had really screwed up.

When she didn't respond, he went behind her and placed his hands on her shoulders while she busied herself putting her hairpins in a container. She was stiff beneath his fingers.

Finally, she met his eyes in the mirror and hers were dull and aloof. He ran his hands down her arms and placed a light kiss near her ear.

"I'm sorry," he whispered softly.

She seemed to shake herself from her thoughts and moved quickly away from him.

"Its fine," she said brusquely, in that familiar tone that adamantly told him that it was _not_ fine.

He followed her into the refresher. "Leia…"

She removed her robe and hung it on a hook next to his. "I cancelled it."

Confusion held him at bay then sudden comprehension struck with a loud thud. "You what?!" Mouth open, eyes narrowed, he followed her back into the bedroom.

She stopped and faced him. "I cancelled the wedding." Her head tipped to one side. "That's what you wanted."

"That's not what I wanted!"

Her eyebrows rose. "Well, it got complicated. I un-complicated it."

Even more frustrated now, he ran a hand through his hair. "Leia," he said gruffly. "I love you and I want to marry you." Why did women always have such extreme reactions?

She turned and he followed her to the dresser, where she plucked a sleepgown from a drawer. "There's no reason for us to get married." She pulled the gown over her head and it fell to drape around her.

"I don't even understand what that means," he replied gruffly.

She turned to him and kept her voice low. "It means that, traditionally, couples get married for various reasons: to have children, to bind two powerful families together…all depending upon one's culture. But, you and I have no such constraints. So, there's no reason for us to get married." In one quick revolution, she left the bedroom.

Leaving Han standing with his mouth hanging open and no idea how to respond. He stood up straight and clamped his mouth shut. It was near impossible to get through to Leia when she got like this. With a growl of pure frustration, he went in search of her.

She was in the kitchen, pouring a glass of wine. Maybe that would relax her and help her see reason.

Moving behind her, he placed his arms around her waist as she took a sip of the wine. He curved his body around her even though she remained rigid and unyielding. He tightened his arms and drew his mouth near her ear. "I love you."

She took another sip, probably to stall. "I love you, too." Her voice was devoid of the emotion that normally accompanied that statement.

Han began dappling her neck with soft kisses. "I wanna marry you," he whispered, trying to convey the depth of his feelings through his voice.

She turned in his arms and now she only looked tired. "Han, the wedding has been cancelled. Maybe someday we can revisit this topic, but for now, I'm done discussing it."

The formality of her words and tone finally slammed against his own line of defenses. "So, I don't get a say in the matter?" he asked, suddenly angry.

"You had your say."

They stared at each other for a long, tense moment, a cacophony of misunderstandings warring between them. Han's lips stiffened together and his eyes grew stony.

"All right," he said in a tension laden voice. He glanced down at the ring she still wore on her right hand. "But, I asked you for a reason. And, somehow, that reason seems to have gotten lost in all this mess."

His jaw set firmly and he did a quick about-face and stormed from the apartment.

###

He had expected Leia to come around. Since she had cancelled the wedding, things had more or less returned to normal. But, every time he brought up the topic of marriage, she shut down.

On the bright side, she continued to wear the ring. Han thought that must be a good sign. Had she taken it off, he would have really worried. And, although things seemed okay between them, there was something missing, something that was difficult to define. That something had bound them together more tightly before all this wedding nonsense.

He tried to blame Mon Mothma, but he could only fault his own stupid mouth. How could Leia take his thoughtless words of aggravation so seriously?

He wanted to marry her; that was why he had asked. And, now that she had cancelled the wedding, he felt a sense of loss for what might have been, and should be.

Never in the past would he have imagined that he would ever get married, much less want it so much. But, he did want it. In his heart, he wanted to be married to Leia. And he wanted her to have that faith in his love that his proposal seemed to give her.

Now, he just needed to find a way to convince her to go through with the wedding.


	13. Chapter 13: Politics

My friends here in the U.S., I hadn't given a thought to the content of the last chapter along with the dark day that yesterday was for Americans. I am posting the next chapter early now because I know these are hard times to get through and if I can make anyone feel just a tiny bit happy, then I will feel better as well. Hope you enjoy this.

To the guest reviewer asking about the fics where Leia is chasing after Han: Yes, I do plan to post them :) When this current fic is done, I will post the longest story I have ever written, called Shackled. It is an AU that starts several weeks before ANH and spans to immediately after ROTJ. There are many differences in this AU timeline, not the exact trajectory as the films. After that, I will post another AU where Leia is the one chasing after Han, and eventually a sequel to that one. And thank you for your kind words :)

###

Fresh from the first official convening of the New Republic Senate, Leia was heartsick. Mon Mothma's Military Disarmament Act had been passed by the Senate. To Leia, it felt like the beginning of the end for the New Republic.

Feeling defeated, she returned to her office, Scho trailing behind her. Once inside the reception area, she leaned heavily on the large, desk.

"Is there anything I can do, Your Highness?"

"Don't call me that," she snapped automatically.

"I'm sorry, Pri—Senator."

She gave the tall, blue-skinned Pantoran a cursory glance. "Take the rest of the day, Scho. I don't think I'll be up to getting anything done today."

"Are you sure, Y—er, Senator?"

"Yes, I'm sure." She dismissed him with a half-hearted wave.

"Thank you." He went behind his desk, gathered his personal things, and quietly said good bye on his way out.

She closed her eyes for a moment, steadying herself. She was at a loss. What was there to do now? Opposing the Military Disarmament Act had been her central focus for months.

A long, deep breath later and Leia pushed herself forward. When the door to her office hushed open, Han was sitting in one of the chairs in front of her desk.

He always seemed to sense when she needed him most. "You heard?"

He nodded soberly, rose from the chair, and enfolded her in his arms.

It helped, to not feel so alone in that moment. She curled into his embrace, soaking up his comfort and strength.

"I'm sorry it went badly," he said quietly from above her head.

She lacked the energy to respond, just allowed herself to be held. After a time, Han pulled back slightly, scooped her up, and carried her to the small sofa against the wall. After taking a seat, he held her cradled in his arms. Leia looked up and gave him a small, appreciative smile.

"I love the way you take care of me," she said softly.

He smiled back, eyes gentle. "I love taking care of you."

Placing a light hand behind his head, she kissed him tenderly on the lips. Then, she rested her head on his shoulder and they stayed that way for a long time.

"I feel like everything we fought for is going to be lost," she whispered.

His deep, confident voice warmed her. "You don't know that."

"It's a feeling I have." Wryly, she added, "Maybe it's the Force."

Han gave a soft snort, his breath huffing against her brow. "I think you need to take yourself away for a few days, regroup."

With a derisive purse of her lips, she replied rhetorically. "Wouldn't that be nice?"

"It will be."

It took a moment for his words to process. She sat up to look at him, a frown drawing her features down. "What does that mean?"

His response came out reluctantly. "It means…I'm taking you away for a few days. It'll cheer you up."

Shocked, she had no words for a moment. "Han, that's sweet, but I can't."

He aimed his crooked grin at her. "You can. I worked it out with your aide. Now that the vote went through, you don't have anything urgent going on." His chin rose, as if daring her to argue.

Slowly, she softened towards the idea. "This is to cheer me up?"

"Yep."

"What if the vote had gone the other way?"

"Then we'd be going away to celebrate."

She smiled. "You thought of everything."

"Pretty sure I did."

"Okay," she said softly. "Let's get away from here for a while."

He grinned more fully and bent to kiss her firmly on the lips. He was, indeed, already taking her mind off her troubles, as her heart fluttered at the touch of his tongue against hers. Mouths clasped together, they took their time before breaking apart.

"I have to pack some things," she uttered breathlessly.

He slowly shook his head. "No, you don't. I packed you a bag. It's on the Falcon."

All she could do was blink in response. Han gave a quiet laugh.

"You really did think of everything!" She was impressed.

###

"Did you intentionally forget to pack me underwear?"

Han swiveled his pilot's chair to face her in the low light of the Falcon's cockpit. He looked as surprised as she was. "Shit. Sorry."

"Not a big deal," she sighed with a tolerant smile. "It's not as if I haven't had to go without it before."

"You won't hear me complaining." He tossed her a sly wink.

"Yes, and I noticed you packed a few short dresses. Coincidence?" She eyed him suspiciously.

He suppressed a laugh and held a hand out to her. She hesitated a moment, teasingly, then took his hand and allowed him to pull her into his lap. His lips nuzzled her neck.

"Mmm," his deep voice vibrated against her skin. "Nothing better than when it's just you an' me alone right here."

"Are you going to tell me where we're going?"

"It's a surprise," he whispered against her ear.

Leia ran her hands along his shoulders and down his back. "Hmm, is there any way I can get it out of you?" She flicked her tongue lightly against the lobe of his ear.

"Well, you can try."

The challenge in his voice spurred her on. Her tongue lapped slowly at his neck.

The sound of his heavy breathing was the only noise in the cockpit. "Is this how the Alliance taught you to extract information?"

"Yes," she breathed against the base of his throat. "It's very effective on Imperial prisoners."

Her fingers began to unfasten his shirt as she kissed a path down his chest. She pushed the shirt open and bent to her knees before him. He grabbed her head in a possessive hand and ground his lips against hers, tongue throbbing inside her mouth.

Leia would a hand between his legs and found him, solid and rigid in her hand. He groaned and his head fell back, eyes closing. She watched the pleasure play across his features as she rubbed and teased him, drawing deep moans from his throat.

She released him, placed her body between his legs, and his eyes opened, heavy-lidded and steamy. Pointing a fingernail at the base of his throat, she raked it lightly down his chest until she reached the waistband of his pants. Slipping her finger inside, she teased from side to side and heard his sharp intake of breath.

"So…where is it that you're taking me?" she whispered, placing her mouth close to his.

He smirked, but his voice was breathless. "I'm not that easy, Sweetheart."

Leia clucked her tongue in disappointment and abruptly rose from the floor, smiling at the confusion that so quickly replaced his smug expression. "Oh, well," she said loudly, disrupting the amorous atmosphere. "Maybe I'll try again later." With a coy shrug, she turned and slowly fled the cockpit.

For a long moment, there was no sound from behind her. Then she heard the creak as Han stood from his chair and his indignant voice rang out in the silence.

"Hey! Wait a minute!"


	14. Chapter 14: Vows

I am happy to hear that a few of you here in the U.S. felt a bit better after my bonus post. I am pretty sure that this chapter will make you smile even wider :D Quite a few of you guessed the outcome already. You guys are psycho-er, I mean psychic ;) Hope you enjoy!

###

From the top of the boarding ramp of the Millennium Falcon, Leia heard the distant sound of rushing water. A river? All she could see was the lush green of a pure, untouched forest. She turned back when she heard Han's footsteps in the corridor.

"Where are we? And what are we doing here?"

"I'm not ready to tell you that, yet." He took her hand in his. "C'mon."

Baffled yet compliant, Leia allowed him to lead her back to their cabin. Inside, he opened a compartment and took out a white garment. He held it out to her.

"Put this on."

One eyebrow rose archly. "Why?"

"Cause I said so." His grin was wide and disarming.

Normally, she bristled at such orders. But, there was something in his smile that begged her not to argue. She took the white bundle from him and held it up.

"It's a dress." She was a bit surprised.

He nodded, still grinning, almost foolishly.

"Are we going to trek through the forest? Because this isn't very practical."

"Don't worry. We're getting a ride."

She was so confused. With a heavy sigh, she removed the casual clothes she was wearing and slipped the dress over her head. Meanwhile, Han was rifling around, in search of something.

Leia turned to the full length reflector that she had awkwardly hung in the cabin.

The white dress was simple, short, and sleeveless, with a tiny bow at the top of each shoulder. It drew in at the waist and flowed just past her knees. She wondered if it was supposed to be that long or if it was customarily worn by someone taller than she.

When she turned away from her image, she saw that Han had changed into a clean, white shirt and was shrugging on a black, long-sleeved jacket. Thoroughly baffled, she placed her hands on her hips.

"What's going on?"

He straightened his jacket and smiled but said nothing, only offered her his arm.

She took it, scowling suspiciously. It only served to enlarge the smile on his face. He led her back to the boarding ramp and now there was an old, rust-colored hovercar parked at the bottom. Sitting in the pilot's seat was a Kirridian male. He smiled serenely beneath his flat, ridged nose.

She looked up at Han. "Who's that?"

"Our driver," he answered, as if it were obvious.

They glided down the ramp and he greeted the driver.

"You must be Solo."

"That's me!" He sounded almost gleeful.

The driver nodded to her. "Your Highness."

She nodded back, stupefied.

Opening the door, Han held Leia's hand in a gentlemanly fashion and helped her into the back, before seating himself next to her and closing the hatch. The car rose into the air and soared over the treetops.

Beneath them was a sea of green foliage and she was suddenly reminded of Alderaan. It had been so long since she had been surrounded by the beauty of nature.

She remained silent, periodically glancing at Han, who still had that pleased smile locked firmly in place. The hovercar rose higher past a peak of high mountains, and they were greeted by a breathtaking sight.

Impossibly blue pools of water were punctuated by low, green-covered mountains, and the rush of dozens of waterfalls poured past cliffs of varying heights. Small tributaries flowed across paths between the falls and the roar of the water competed with the whine of the hovercar's engines. Leia was dazzled and all her questions were momentarily forgotten.

"It's beautiful," she whispered reverently.

"Not as beautiful as you," Han whispered, low near her ear.

She smiled against her will and returned her attention to the landscape as the hovercar lowered slowly to a clearing to one side of the water. When the engine was cut, she could only hear the soothing, peaceful sounds of the flowing water.

The driver climbed from the car and held the door open. Han and Leia vacated their seats and she couldn't help the smile on her face. Taking Han's arm, she gazed up at him.

"You picked a very romantic getaway."

"It's more than that." He lifted her hand and kissed it before following the driver from the clearing.

Leia now saw that the driver wore long, brown robes that reminded her of the monks at the monasteries of Tildon. She wondered why he remained with them. Was he a guide?

They followed a long path that brought them to the edge of a small waterfall. She hadn't expected to be climbing through this terrain and the slight heel of her gray shoes made her a bit unsteady. Han guided her with her hand in his.

The soft thunder of the water was all around them now, as they slowly made their way to a densely grassed patch that was in the center of the coursing waterfalls.

Once there, Han turned and placed his hands on her shoulders. For the first time since they had landed, his smug exterior was permeated by obvious nervousness. His eyes were very serious.

"Leia," he said earnestly. "Marry me. Right here. Right now."

Dumbstruck, she couldn't think for a moment, just stared at him in blind shock. When she finally found her voice, her words came out in a breathless rush.

"You're serious?"

He nodded, looking infinitely vulnerable and anxious. Tears sprung to her eyes and she blinked them back, pressed her lips together to still their trembling. Unable to speak around the tightness in her throat, she only nodded, smiling through shocked tears.

Han released a breath she hadn't realized he was holding and beamed at her; Leia thought she had never seen him so happy. His hands surrounded her face and the kiss he bestowed on her was filled with emotion.

Having forgotten everything but each other, they were shaken from the moment by the clearing of a throat. Sheepishly, they broke apart.

"Leia, this is Akcen Shar. He's a Divine Elder of the Monks of Eremetica."

She shot Han a surprised look. "You truly did think of everything," she marveled softly. Her eyes turned back to the Elder and she easily fell into diplomatic mode.

"Thank you so much for coming all this way for us."

"It is an honor." He bowed his head. "Are we ready to begin?"

Holding onto Han's arm, she nodded.

The Elder stood tall and crossed his hands in front of him. "Han Solo. Princess Leia Organa. Please join hands."

They faced each other and their eyes met with nervous, excited smiles. Was this really happening?

The Elder's voice was solid and comforting. "On this day, we celebrate a union that will be sealed to an unbreakable bond. There are many known forms of marriage in this galaxy, and today, Han and Leia will be bound in a Monogamous Union, sanctioned by the Order of the Eremetica."

Looking in Han's eyes, Leia saw her past, her present, and her future. She had never felt as content as in that moment.

"In the tradition of monogamy, do you both forsake all others and hold only the other in the highest esteem?"

"Yes," they answered in unison, embracing each other with their eyes.

"Will you support and protect each other in any and all perils?"

"Yes," they both answered, Leia's soft voice echoing Han's deeper one. _Perils…_ she thought, the past four years flashing by in a heartbeat.

"Will you build a life together and never abandon that life?"

"Yes." As the word was shared between them, Han squeezed her hands, an extra, silent promise.

Leia heard a soft rustling and they both glanced at the Elder. He pulled two items from within his robes. One was a small spade. In his other hand, he held a tiny, green plant, the dark roots twirling and dangling fresh below.

"These roots represent your foundation. The seedling of the Stemma Tree that grows from the roots is your bond. Now, together, you will place the roots in a cup. You will nurture this tree, make it grow, as you will nurture your union. Keep both strong and you will have a beautiful life together."

He held the plant out to them and Han reached to receive it. The Elder placed the seedling in his hand and handed Leia the spade before removing a small, silver cup from his robes.

"Leia, please place some soil in the cup."

With a small smile at Han, she bent down, dug up a small amount of dirt then stood and poured it into the cup.

The Elder turned towards Han. "Now, Han, it is your turn to place soil in the cup."

She handed the spade to him and he passed her the plant. Looking a bit bewildered, he stooped down and dug up some soil. After he poured it inside, the Elder handed the cup to Han. He gestured towards Leia and she took her cue, placing the seedling into the cup and covering the roots with soil.

Reaching forward, the Elder placed Leia's hand on one side of the cup, so that both she and Han were holding it.

"Under the shield of the Monks of Eremetica, Han Solo and Princess Leia Organa, you are bonded in a Monogamous Union for all time. May you cherish and nurture this bond."

And it was done. They were married. Leia gazed up at Han, her husband. Over the small plant, he leaned down and sealed their bond with a kiss.


	15. Chapter 15: Consumation

And on to the wedding night ;)

###

Inside their cabin in the Millennium Falcon, Leia watched Han move through the small space to dim the lights to a low glow. He turned and flashed her a boyish grin.

"C'mere, wife." He held out a hand.

She was smiling so wide, her cheeks were beginning to hurt. Moving forward, she took his hand. "Yes, husband?"

His hands ran up and down her bare arms and his smile broadened. He leaned low and kissed her upturned lips, long and languorously. When they parted, Leia shook her head in slow amazement.

"I still can't believe you did this. How did you manage it?"

"Well, I had a little help."

"From who?"

"Lando," he admitted with a trace of chagrin.

"Lando helped plan our wedding?" Her smile was ironic. "That's delightful."

They shared a short laugh and the sparkle in Han's eyes sent a warm sense of wonder coursing through her.

"Now, we don't even have to tell anyone," he murmured.

She frowned. "You want to keep it a secret?"

"Not a secret. We'll tell the people who matter…Luke, Chewie…screw the rest of 'em. If they find out, fine. If they don't, that's fine too. This is about us, not anyone else."

A little light sparked inside her. "You're right," she said softly. She gazed up at him, this man she adored, who was now her husband. Two and a half years ago, the thought of marrying Han Solo would have made her laugh until someone began to doubt her sanity. Now, she couldn't imagine being without him. "I love you…so much," she whispered, eyes intent on his.

His responding smile was tender, sweet. "I love you, too."

Her eyes dropped then returned quickly to his. "I'm sorry I doubted you and cancelled the wedding."

His hands encircled her face, thumbs stroking her cheeks. "Worked out for the best."

Her gaze fell to his chest again. "It did. But, I was hurt. And I didn't handle it very well."

"Well, no, you didn't," he said, jostling her chin to raise her eyes to his. At the small glower that was her response, he added, "But, I said something really stupid and I didn't mean it." He paused. "I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too," she said with a small nod. "I felt like you didn't really want to get married and you were only doing it because it's what you thought I wanted."

Half of his face boosted in a smug grin. "You should know me better than that. I don't do anything I don't wanna do." The grin faded. "What do you mean, I thought it's what you wanted? You didn't want to?"

 _We're both ridiculous,_ she thought, smiling. "Of course I did," she soothed. "I just hadn't really thought about it. I mean, I did, but in a distant, maybe-someday kind of way. And I had no idea if you had ever even given it a thought."

His eyes lowered to watch his finger trace the line of her bottom lip. She kissed the tip softly. "I thought about it on Endor," he confessed and when he looked at her, he seemed amused by her look of surprise. "But, it seemed crazy and impossible at the time."

She frowned slightly, confused. "What does that mean?"

His lips pursed to one side, a look that Leia recognized as mild discomfort. "Well, you know…it hadn't been very long." His brow furrowed. "Well, I guess it kind of was for you. But, I'd been trapped in carbonite for six months…" His voice trailed off.

Leia sensed there was more that he was not saying. She placed a hand on the side of his neck and brushed it gently down to rest against his chest. "And there was a lot going on…to say the least."

He gave a sardonic half-smile. "Well, here we are." His voice rumbled, deep and low in the complete silence. She loved the sound of his voice, always had.

"Here we are," she echoed softly.

They stared into each other's eyes with small, matching smiles of anticipation. Han's hand moved to her chin and gently smoothed down the curve of her throat. The soft, sensuousness of his touch caused her eyes to fall shut, her head to tip back. A dreamy sigh escaped her. His fingers skimmed between her breasts, were then replaced by the steamy feel of his mouth and tongue. He paused to slide the dress over her head and dropped it to the floor.

The intense undercurrent between them felt more poignant and ardent than ever before. Eyes closed, she was lost beneath his touch, could imagine no more beautiful feeling. His hands outlined the curves of her breasts, her stomach, her hips, and then he lowered to his knees and took her nipple in his mouth, his tongue softly coaxing it rigid and excited.

Her hands buried in his hair, the pleasure of his tongue on one nipple, then the other, driving her mad, until she was pressing her hips urgently against him. His tongue drifted down her stomach and dipped inside her navel, tickling intensely.

With an unbidden laugh, she pushed at his head and gave him a mock-glare. He knew she didn't like when he did that, yet he loved to tease her when she was lost in the moment.

"Scoundrel," she growled at his mischievous grin.

"That's me." His voice was low and seductive, his eyes dark and hooded with passion. He stood suddenly and crushed her to him with gentle force, mouth claiming hers, hungry and gasping.

"I love you," he breathed against her lips.

Overwhelmed with emotion, Leia drew back and gazed at him, found his eyes bright and soft. "I love you, too," she said with the gentle touch of her fingers against his cheek.

His hands slid down her curves and he slipped his arms fully around her waist to carry her to the bunk. One arm lowered her as the other held his weight. She saw his brief look of surprise when she raised a leg, wrapped it around his torso, and pulled him firmly down on top of her.

"You've got some strong legs, Sweetheart."

Her eyebrows quirked up and down playfully before she released him and pushed him to his back in one, brisk motion. He chuckled affectionately as she began opening the fastenings of his shirt. Han placed both hands behind his head and watched her with a pleased expression. One hand splayed across his belly, stroking upwards across his chest, while the other opened the fastening of his pants.

"You going to take these off?" she asked with the raise of a brow.

"You take 'em off." His chin lifted in a challenge.

The corners of her mouth arced up in a small smile as she slipped off the end of the bunk, grabbed at his pants' legs, and pulled them off.

"What about the shirt?"

"Enjoying this, are you?"

"Oh, very much," he crooned. He sat up and offered her an arm.

With a roll of her eyes, she pulled off one sleeve then the other before tossing them to the floor with his pants.

"Time to lose these," Han said, slowly sliding her panties past her hips and down to her knees. She stepped out of them and he threw them across the room with a flourish. "Mm, c'mere," he growled low in his throat, his hands skating down her hips and pulling her on top of him.

Their sighs intermingled at the fusion of their skin and Leia felt him, solid and hot against the silken mound between her thighs. She was wet instantly, tensing urgently against the heat of him. His hands moved to encircle her hips and he was lifting her up then slowly pulling her down to engulf him. They moaned together and Leia was overwhelmed by the sensation of him filling her so completely. With excruciating slowness, his hips rose and lowered in rhythmic undulations, driving him deeper inside her with each upward thrust.

His hands on her buttocks held her in place, allowing her no control over their movements. She rode the pulse of his cadence for some time until the urgency within her began to swell and surge and her movements began to overtake his. Han released his grip on her and allowed her to set the pace; she grew more frantic, as their moans became loud, fervent gasps that thickened and clung in the sultry air between them.

"Leia…" The guttural groan of her name barely reached her ears and when she looked down at him, his mouth was open and his eyes bored into hers, beseeching intimacy.

His naked, searching gaze moved her and their eyes grasped and held tightly. Leia bent low, her hands on either side of his head, eyes close and burning into each other. With a shift inside her, the angle of him sent a sharp, shock through her that caused her hips to quiver. With increased fervor, she rode him; he grabbed her buttocks and drove into her, over and over, battering something inside her that flashed an intense spike of pleasure like never before, her hips bucking wildly.

And then the moment struck…agonizing in its intensity, endlessly tense, taut, and straining, hot white and brilliant.

Then, Han was thrusting inside her again and the lightning blast crashed through her once more, streaming, gushing, making her mindless and weak. With a harsh growl, his hips rose from the bed and he was suddenly bucking with raging need; with one last barrage of thrusts, he cried out in unbridled bliss, momentarily frozen and overwhelmed, before streaming inside her with a burst of staccato movements that reignited Leia's passion. As Han erupted inside her, she found herself shuddering and crying out in release again, her entire being tensing and trembling. She collapsed on top of him, sweaty and quivering, unable to think.

As her mind recovered, her heavy, humid breathing matched his. Just as she realized that the damp shroud of her dark hair was practically suffocating her, Han's hand gently swiped it away from her face, tossing it aside carelessly. She breathed in deeply and placed a soft kiss on his chest. His arms went around her, feeling boneless and vague.

"That was…" The words heaved from his lips but the sentence remained unfinished.

"Yeah," she huffed back, still trying to catch her breath. She felt him kiss the top of her head and they remained just so, blissful and depleted.

###

Leia woke, a bit disoriented, having fallen asleep unwittingly. She became aware that she was lying on top of Han and realization spun a heady, peaceful feeling inside her.

 _We're married,_ she thought, a smile springing to her lips. The steady, slow rise and fall of his chest beneath her cheek was soothing and she remained unmoving so as not to wake him.

Her reaction those few weeks ago had been extreme and childish, characteristics that rarely described her. Well, they had often described her in relation to Han, before they came together while fleeing Hoth. He had somehow brought that quality forth from her starting the moment they met. But, it rarely ever surfaced these days. Perhaps things did happen for a reason, since it had worked out for the best. Their wedding was everything she could have asked for.

It would have been nice to have Luke and Chewie there. But, this had been infinitely nicer than marrying before hundreds of strangers.

 _I am a wife, I have a husband._ The reality was almost unfathomable. Before meeting Han, Leia had never wanted marriage. How could she possibly find the time or energy? The idea had seemed distant and vague, something that was meant for other women, women who were not dedicated to fighting the Empire.

But, Han…she snuggled closer to him, adoring the sense that he was hers, and she, his.

Where would she be had she never met Han? Would she be living a solitary life as a Senator on Chandrila? Would it have occurred to her that she might want more? Having played a pivotal role in both of the most important battles against the Empire, would the Alliance ever have even won without Han?

No, her destiny was intertwined with his. There were no 'what-ifs.' She had always thought that the moment Han kissed her had changed her destiny. She realized now that her destiny had, in fact, changed the moment she met him. She just hadn't known it at the time.

As if being woken by the gentle roaming of his movements through her thoughts, he began to stir, the arms at his sides shifting, one sliding with smooth warmth across the skin of her back.

"Mmmm," he expelled through closed lips, body arching upwards, one arm reaching for something unseen. Leia gazed up at him and his eyes opened slowly, hazy from sleep. He smiled lazily then crossed both arms around her. "Are we really married?" he asked in a thick, sleep-laden voice.

Her smile was immediate. "We sure are."

His eyes closed and he held her more tightly. "Good," he said simply.

Leia smiled to herself. Quietly content, they lay in comfortable silence for a time, before Leia spoke again.

"Did you ever think about marriage before we met?"

"No," he said immediately, a soft snort accompanying his reply.

"Neither did I."

"Yeah, I remember you saying that once."

"I said that?" She placed her hands together on his chest and rested her chin on her hands so that she could look at him.

"Yeah. On Ord Mantell."

Leia searched her memory, gaze drawing inward. She came up empty.

"At the Sweet Spot." His voice held a hint of humor. "I was tryin' to see if you'd go for that Bothan."

The memory slid into place like suddenly blasting into hyperdrive. "I remember now," she said with a chuckle, meeting his eyes again. "It struck me as a strange conversation at the time. Especially with you."

He grinned. "I had an ulterior motive."

She returned his grin. "I see that now." He slid his hands up and down her back and Leia savored the caress. "Marriage always seemed incidental to me. I didn't even have time to contemplate it." Her voice softened. "But, you've changed so much about me."

He gazed at her thoughtfully. "I don't think I changed you. I think I just stirred you up a bit. Brought different things to the surface."

To Leia, that seemed an excellent metaphor. "Hmm, sometimes you do have a way with words."

His eyebrows raised and quickly lowered and she could tell that her observation made him uncomfortable.

"I think I did the same to you," she said softly, wonder glowing in her eyes.

Han's lower lip jutted out in brief contemplation before he gave a half-shrug and a tiny nod of recognition.

"As soon as we met, I had the sense there was more to you than you let on," she confessed.

A smile slid up one side of his face but he said nothing.

She grinned ironically. "But, you were so set on showing me otherwise."

"Hey, I had a reputation to uphold."

She shook her head and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Well, if you hadn't been upholding your reputation, maybe we wouldn't have wasted three years arguing."

"Wasn't it worth the wait?"

She couldn't disagree so she gave him a mock-sour look. "Think of all those missions we went on together. Instead of fighting, we could have been making love."

"Hmm. I think we're just gonna have to make up for those three years."

Leia tried to force the corners of her lips down, but they rose against her will. "I don't know how we could possibly find the time."

"Well," he replied in a seductive tone. "We'll be here for two more days. And it is our honeymoon."

With a small smile, she placed a soft, open-mouthed kiss on his chest then looked back to him.

"You know, when we met, I thought we were so different," she said wistfully.

"Me, too. At first."

Her head canted to one side. "Only at first?"

"Yeah," he answered reluctantly.

Leia's eyes grew intense and curious. "When did you realize that we were not so different?"

Typical discomfort flitted through his eyes but she saw him pushing through it. "I dunno. At first, all I saw was your Princess-ness." He paused to smirk. "And your dedication to the Alliance. That's kinda all there was to see."

She was fascinated, listening intently.

"After a while, I could see what was going on behind all that. That you were scared."

"And what did you suppose I was scared of?"

His eyes held tightly to hers. "To care. About anything but the Rebellion."

Their gazes remained locked for a long moment and Leia contemplated her next words then forged ahead. "Like you were scared to care about anyone but Chewie and your ship," she said softly.

He nodded slightly as his eyes fell away then returned.

"I wasn't always like that," she said sadly, thoughts straying to Alderaan. The pain had dimmed but would never burn out.

"I know."

The certainty in his voice drew her eyes instantly back to his, where they burrowed with seriousness. "You gave me back that piece of myself that was missing."

His gaze was just as somber. "It wasn't missing. It was just…" He floundered for a word. "Hiding." He shrugged.

She smiled through a barely noticeable sting of tears. "Just like your heart."

The swift bout of vulnerability that momentarily clouded his eyes touched her. Had she glanced away, she would have missed it. He covered his feelings with that half-grin that she had grown so fond of.

"One thing that wasn't hiding was your smartass mouth."

She mirrored his crooked smile. "That's right. It was right there in the open, with yours."

His grin grew smug and he suddenly rolled her to her back, one leg slinging comfortably over hers, his head propped on his raised arm. "Yeah, well, I was just tryin' to keep up with you."

"Oh, I'm sure." Her voice was drenched in sarcasm.

They smiled into each other's eyes and Han leaned down to kiss her, beginning the long process of making up for three years…


	16. Chapter 16: Proposal

So happy you all enjoyed the wedding night :)

###

Leia exited the turbolift, intent on Mon Mothma's office. She wondered if she was about to be reprimanded for her campaign against the Military Disarmament Act.

Having worked together so closely during the Rebellion, she was taken aback by how distant Mon had become. Once a valued and respected colleague, Leia was now treated as if she were just one Senator among many. She tried not to let it get to her, but she couldn't help feeling a bit stung.

At her outer office, Mon Mothma's receptionist asked her to take a seat. Mind unoccupied, her thoughts dwelt on her wedding at Shimmer Falls just a few weeks ago. Never before had they had the luxury of lounging about for three days. It had been blissful.

She couldn't help the smile that rose unbidden to her lips. She was jolted from her reverie by the announcement that Chancellor Mothma was ready to receive her.

When Leia entered, Mon rose and came around her desk to greet her. She hugged her with uncharacteristic warmth.

"It is so wonderful to see you away from the Senate floor, Leia."

Although a bit perplexed, she played the game like the politician she was. "It is lovely to see you, too."

"Please, come sit with me." She gestured to a small sofa against the wall and Leia followed and sat facing her, one leg crossed over the other, hands upon her knee. "Have you been well?"

"I have. And you?" She wished the older woman would get to the point.

She smiled, eyes tired. "Busy beyond words. But, otherwise, well."

"I imagine you didn't call me here to make small talk."

Mon smiled benevolently. "I did not."

With a tilt of her head and a raise of her brow, Leia signaled that they should get down to business.

"I received a visitor this morning," she informed her younger comrade. "The Prince of the Prospero System arrived with an agenda."

"And what is his agenda?"

"He would like to forge an alliance with the New Republic."

Leia was surprised. The Prospero System was a very large system bordering the Outer Rim and had a history of avoiding ties with any galactic government. The Royal Family ruled over all the planets in the system, most of which were very wealthy. It was said that they paid Palpatine a large price to maintain their independence.

"I wonder at their motivation," Leia said quietly.

"I do, too."

"Perhaps they are experiencing financial struggles that we are not aware of. Did they declare terms?"

"They did."

"What were the terms?"

Mon smiled in silence for a moment. "The Prince is asking for your hand in marriage."

At first, the words made no sense to Leia. She paused, trying to order them in her head for a long, drawn-out moment. Their meaning suddenly snapped in her mind, like a heavy stone dropped into a shallow pond with a loud plop. "My…marriage?" she sputtered.

Mon smiled wryly. "He wishes for an audience with you, but wanted you to be prepared."

Leia was shocked and baffled. She had never met the Prince, nor had any dealings with the Prospero System. And never had she ever considered marrying in such a fashion. "What did you tell him?"

"I told him that the New Republic would support his campaign and that I would be very happy to speak to you on his behalf."

Anger replaced the shock in Leia's eyes. "How could you say such a thing? Do you actually believe I would agree to marry this stranger? That you can sell me to the highest bidder?" She could feel her face flushed with outrage.

"It's not like that, Leia—,"

She cut her off with impunity. "You've known my family all my life. Is this what you believe my father would have wanted for me?"

Mon's eyes were startled in the face of the younger woman's anger. She blinked several times before answering. "Leia," she began slowly, her voice remaining even. "I did not expect you to enter into a marriage blindly. I was hoping that you would meet with the Prince, get to know him, and perhaps things might move forward from there."

"And what about Han?" She was seething beneath the deadly calm.

She blinked again. "Well…you cancelled the wedding. I assume your relationship is approaching its end."

Leia's eyes went hard and cold. "Han and I are married."

Mon Mothma's mouth formed a small circle of surprise and she seemed at a loss for words.

Leia continued. "The wedding was becoming too much. So, we did what was best for us. We went ahead and married privately, which was what _we_ wanted."

The two women stared at each other for a long moment, Leia's expression steely, Mon's one of surprised dismay. "Congratulations," she finally said quietly.

Leia said nothing and her gaze did not waver.

"Had I known, I would not have summoned you, of course."

Jaw set, she remained silent.

"I'm sorry, Leia."

After a curt nod of acknowledgement, she spoke brusquely. "Is there anything else?"

Mon shook her head and Leia rose, without a word, and stormed from the Chancellor's office.

###

Han watched Leia pacing back and forth in the main room, small feet pounding tirelessly, words spewing forth like lava from a volcano.

"The nerve! The unmitigated nerve!" she continued to rant. Halting to face him, her hands gesticulated wildly. "She barely acknowledges me anymore! And now…now, she summons me in order to dictate my life? To tell me whom I should marry? For the good of the New Republic?" A grunt of frustration burst forth before she resumed pacing.

At the news, Han had initially been pissed off. Now, he was over it. It was done and, in the end, did not affect them at all. "Forget about it, Leia. It's over now, no real harm done."

She whirled on him. "You don't get it! It's the principle of the matter."

He was reminded of the fact that, in spite of her being more pragmatic than most of the women he had known, Leia still was, in fact, a woman. Placing his elbow on his knee, he rested his mouth in his hand, encouraging himself to keep quiet and let this tirade play out.

"My father always told me he wanted me to marry for love, not out of responsibility. Mon knew my father for a long time. How could she expect that of me?"

He squashed the few responses that popped into his head. She stopped and finally took a long, deep breath and he thought perhaps she might be done.

With slightly less fire in her eyes, she went on. "She just assumed we weren't going to stay together."

As far as anyone knew, they had called off the wedding. To Han, it didn't seem like such a leap of thought. "Why does that make you so upset?" After it came out of his mouth, he remembered his plan to not speak.

She hugged herself and sighed. "I don't know. It just does."

Her lips were clasped together and Han just watched her for a long moment. Thoughts flitted through his mind as he stood, went to her, and took her in his arms. She burrowed into him as if it were what she had been waiting for all along. Her arms closed around his waist as he ran his hands up and down her back.

"Don't let Mothma get to you," he said quietly.

"It's not just her." Her voice was soft and he could barely make out her words.

He frowned. "What else is it?" He waited but she didn't answer. "Hmm? Talk to me." Her silence persisted until he stepped back to look at her. She diverted her gaze. He was well aware that she would not talk until she was ready, no matter how much he badgered her.

"I feel like everyone is against us," she finally said to his chest. "I always have. From the beginning."

"Who's everyone?" He had often felt the same, but wanted her to explain more fully. He reached across and took her hand in his, squeezing gently.

She gave a slight shrug. "Everyone is…everyone." Her small smile was sardonic.

"They probably are."

Her brow rose in surprise then lowered in confusion. Before she could reply, Han continued.

"Look at us." He gestured between them. "You said it yourself, we seem like we're totally different. We're sure as hell from different worlds, and I don't just mean location-wise." At his pause, she only stared, uncomprehending. "Think about it. Even we didn't see how much alike we were for a long time."

The first spark of understanding lit her eyes.

"So that's all anybody else sees," he finished.

She smiled for the first time since she had arrived home.

"Not that it's anyone's business," he added. "And not that I care what anyone thinks."

Leia moved closer to him and gripped his hands more tightly. "Normally, I don't care either. It's just…Mon has known me for my entire life. She knew my father very well. But, it seems she doesn't really know me at all." She sighed tiredly. "Then again, I'm no longer that young Princess of Alderaan," she said, staring at nothing with a wistful expression.

"You're still my Princess." He kept his voice low and husky.

A sweet smile brightened her eyes. "That's what matters."

With a warm glint in his eyes, Han lowered his lips to hers. Just as they touched, the door chime pinged. With a slight frown, Han disengaged and crossed the room to the security cam. After a glance at the screen, his head swiveled to Leia.

"It's a Guardian Messenger." With one hand on his blaster, he ambled to the door and palmed it open. A short, dark-haired man in a purple Guardian uniform held a small, square package.

"Delivery for Princess Leia Organa and Han Solo."

He held out a hand and the man scanned Han's palm for delivery notification then handed him the package. The door slid shut between them as he turned towards Leia.

"Who is it from?" she asked.

Examining it, he found no information. He held it out to her and she took it with a small frown. Ripping away the sealed shipping paper, she revealed a small, blue box, tied with a white ribbon. An envelope was attached to the side. She removed the card with one hand and flipped it open.

Han watched her eyes widen in surprise. She read the card aloud. "Congratulations on your nuptials. Wishing you a lifetime of happiness…Mon Mothma." Her eyes flew to his.

He was equally surprised. "Her way of apologizing?"

"I suppose so."

"So, open it."

His words seemed to jolt her from her thoughts. With delicate hands, she pulled the ribbon loose and opened the top of the box. He watched her peer inside, expression curious.

"It's a holo." She reached inside and retrieved it as Han came closer.

The base was a holoprojector about five inches wide. Adorned on the front of the base were two flags. One was the flag of Alderaan and one the flag of Corellia. The green, blue, and white of the Alderaanian flag looked rather nice next to the lighter blue background of the Corellian flag, with its green stripe and small white stars.

It had never before occurred to Han that the flags of their homeplanets were so similar. It wasn't the kind of thing he paid attention to. Leia glanced up to meet his eyes before pressing the button to activate the holo.

It sprung to life between them, sitting in the palm of her hand. It was momentarily fuzzy and hazy then snapped clear. A small, still image appeared of Han and Leia on Yavin IV, after the medal ceremony.

They looked at each other, eyes sharp.

"Hey, where you think she got that?" he asked.

"I suppose the Alliance archives."

They both examined it closely. Leia stood beside Han, leaning into him, his arm around her shoulders. He wore the medal around his neck and they were grinning at each other, looking sublimely happy in that moment. She looked stunning, just as he remembered her from that day. A wave of nostalgia struck him. Things had been so unbelievably different back then.

"Do you realize that this is the only holo we have of us together?" she asked quietly. "After all these years."

He had never thought about it before, but she was right. "I guess we've been kinda busy." He smiled encouragingly, seeing that her mood had become solemn.

She nodded, eyes preoccupied.

"If I remember correctly, right after this was taken, I said something that really pissed you off and you walked away."

With a wry smile, she glanced up at him. "I'm sure."

Her eyes returned to the holo and he watched her carefully, trying to read what might be passing through her mind. She tipped her head thoughtfully to one side but her expression revealed nothing.

"We need to pay more attention," she finally said, still staring at the holo.

For a moment, he tried to decipher her meaning. He was unsuccessful. "To what?"

"Moments."

"Not sure what you mean."

"Moments like this." She gestured to the image. "We need more holos."

"Okay." He shrugged. "We'll take some holos."

She gazed up at him, eyes now lit with inspiration. "It's important." She glanced around the apartment.

"Okay."

"If something were to happen to you…or me…" Her gaze grew very serious, mouth pinched. She shook her head slowly. "I don't want this to be the only memento of us together."

Drawn into the gravity of the moment, he held her gaze and nodded, a sudden hollow in the pit of his stomach. The thought of anything happening to Leia…it was more than he could take. He cleared his throat and forced those thoughts down.

"Where you wanna put it?"

Still holding the image in her palm, her eyes roamed the room. Her gaze fell on the shelf to the left that held the one souvenir of their wedding, the tree. In the pot, it had grown to a mere five inches since they had arrived home from Shimmer Falls.

With sudden resolve, Leia strode to the shelf that held the pot and placed the holo next to it. She smiled.

"This is a good place for it," she declared.

Han moved to stand beside her and put an arm around her shoulders. He smiled, agreeing whole heartedly. "It is." With an uncharacteristic feeling of wistfulness, he decided that Leia was right. They needed more holos.


	17. Chapter 17: History

Sorry the post is late, long week. Happy Thanksgiving to those in the U.S.!

###

"Do you remember your parents?"

Han knew that the surprise in his eyes was evident for a moment, before he forced them hard and dull, his typical, reflexive reaction to that topic. Even with his wife, he was never comfortable talking about his childhood.

"No." His eyes returned to the holovid.

Beside him on the sofa, Leia sighed. "I suppose that could be either a good or bad thing. Depending on how you look at it."

Han watched her bite her lip. Between the question and her pensive expression, he could easily guess what she was thinking about. "This is about Vader." It wasn't a question.

She nodded silently and he turned off the holovid before dropping the controller to one side. Spinning to face her, he gave her his full attention.

"Do you ever wonder how much genetics plays into who you are?" she asked quietly.

He bundled her into his arms. "No."

She was pliable in his embrace, her features distracted and intense. "Never?"

"Never."

"I've been thinking about it a lot. Nature versus nurture." She looked at him suddenly. "Have you ever wanted to find out who your parents were?"

"Not since I was a kid." His gaze wandered away from hers as he squirmed inside. Her palm laid against his cheek and brought him back to face her.

"Why not?"

He shrugged, feeling too vulnerable for his liking. "What's the point? They don't have nothin' to do with me."

Her eyes were intent on his and he angled his head to rest against her chest, out of her field of vision.

"I wish I had the luxury of thinking that way." She sighed heavily, causing his head to rise and fall, as if on an ocean wave.

"You should feel that way. Vader doesn't have anything to do with who you are."

"You don't know that."

He raised his head to look at her and his voice became hard and vehement. "I do know that. Cause I know what Vader was." He softened his tone. "And I know who you are."

Their gazes held for a long, poignant moment.

"Sweetheart, don't beat yourself up over something that's out of your control."

"I wish I knew how my mother could have fallen in love with the man who would become Darth Vader." Her mouth twisted as if she had just tasted something bitter.

Han couldn't fathom how to respond to that.

Her expression shifted and she looked at him with curious concern. "How did you imagine your parents to be when you were a child?"

This was his least favorite topic. He was not about to confess the childish dreams of his parents returning for him. But, Leia was going through something and he forced his thoughts to the past. It wasn't easy to go back that far. After a moment, he shrugged. "I guess I thought maybe they got sick or something," he answered gruffly, eyes focused on nothing. "That maybe they were dead."

When he looked up, her eyes were soft and sympathetic and it just increased his discomfort.

"Eventually, I decided it didn't matter," he added quickly. He allowed his gaze to drift away, but could still feel her eyes on him. At times, he regretted confessing to Leia that he had grown up in a boys' shelter. He didn't like thinking about his past, much less talking about it.

"How did you come by the name Solo?" she asked in a low tone.

With a grim press of his lips, he breathed harshly through his nose. "I didn't have a surname as a kid. When you reach fifteen they ask you to pick one." His eyes fell to the porcelain skin of her neck. "I picked Solo. Cause I decided I was better off alone. That I didn't need anyone."

"Han," she whispered, drawing his blank gaze back to her. The backs of her fingers caressed his lower lip then the scar on his chin before she looked into his eyes. "You're never going to be alone again. And I hope I give you all the love you never had before."

A sudden, hard knot formed in his throat and he tried to vanquish it with a long swallow. It did not disappear and he found that the gulp just made it hurt more. The moment seemed endless and he was lost for words. Pulling her into his arms seemed the safest response and he held her in place for a long time as she stroked the hair at the back of his head.

"I love you," she breathed near his ear.

"I know." The old, cocky joke felt devoid of meaning in that moment. "I love you, too." He closed his eyes against the fresh rush of emotions.

After a time, she pulled back to look at him. "I just wonder…can darkness be inborn?"

"I don't know. But, I know it's not in you."

"You don't think everyone has a dark side? That there's a tipping point, so to speak, that can send them in either direction?"

He thought about it for a few moments. He knew what his tipping point was. Leia. If anyone hurt her…he could easily imagine flying into a blind rage. "I guess we all might have that point. But it takes less to bring it out in some than it does in others. But you…" He looked at her meaningfully. "You're too caring for your own good. It would take a hell of a lot to get you to that point."

Doubt held her in its unsteady embrace, he could see it in her eyes. "Sometimes I think that. Other times, I'm not so sure. My father was always worried about my temper. I never thought much of that, but these days I wonder. Was he afraid I might become like Vader?"

"Hey," he said lightly, trying to brighten her mood. "Your temper's only been bad with me. And if you didn't kill me in those three years of fighting, you could never turn to the dark side."

She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Is Luke pestering you again about training with him?"

Her head moved quickly back and forth. "No. He hasn't mentioned it since you blasted him for it." She smiled affectionately.

Han nodded, pleased.

"I just think about this a lot. Ever since I found out about…"

"I wish you'd never found out."

"I can't wish that," she said with a brief shake of her head. "Then I would never know about Luke. He's the only family I have."

"Don't forget about me," Han chided in a gruff voice.

"And you," she added gently with a raise of both brows. "It's just changed my view of everything. Especially myself."

"You're no different than you were before." He was growing tired of rehashing this particular topic.

"I feel as if I am."

"What makes you different?" His voice challenged her. "So, before you didn't know who your…birth parents were." He carefully sidestepped use of the words 'real parents,' a mistake he had made in the past. "You were the same person then as you are now. Now, you just have this new knowledge."

She sat up, forcing him to follow. "Just the knowledge alone makes me different."

"I don't see it that way."

She was growing frustrated with him, he could see it in the tightening around her eyes. "Just the fact that I could use the Force changes me."

"How?"

"It leaves me open to too many possibilities. Some of them too dark."

With a breath exhaled through pursed lips, he shook his head. "So, don't use the Force. Problem solved."

"That's been my decision thus far."

"It's a good decision."

"I suppose."

"It is."

Her eyes were suddenly large and vulnerable. "It's a decision made out of fear."

"Doesn't mean it's wrong."

She stared down at her hands, one fingernail flicking at the others. "It must be what my father wanted. Why else would he hide the truth from me?"

"Why? So you didn't torment yourself like you're doing now."

Her eyes met his and he could see he had affected her. "But, then I think that perhaps he had me seek out Obi Wan for a reason."

Han took her hands firmly in his. "Leia, you have to stop playing this 'what if' game. Just do what feels right to you."

She nodded without looking at him. After a few moments, she looked at him with a small smile. "You feel right to me."

Responding with a crooked grin, he placed one arm around her waist. "So, then maybe you should do me."

Her smile slowly broadened, eyes growing heavy-lidded. She placed a hand behind his head and pulled him to her. Just as he reached her lips, he pulled back, teasing. Her quick move closer halted and she gave him a coy look through her lashes.

Knowing she needed to be utterly distracted, he pushed her roughly down to lie on the sofa, pinning her shoulders. At her sharp, excited intake of breath, he felt a glimmer of satisfaction at knowing his wife so well.

Burying one hand in her dark, loose hair, he tugged gently.

"Harder," she whispered, eyes focused and intent on his.

He pulled her hair harder, bringing his mouth close to hers then pulling her away with his grip on her hair. She gasped and her eyes fell shut, mouth open in anticipation. His lips finally captured hers, tongue brashly invading to find hers.

It was a distraction, one he did not mind being a part of. The roughness, the playful torment, diverted her thoughts completely from the demons that tormented her on the inside.


	18. Chapter 18: Longing

And the last chapter leads to this...

###

Amidst the beings chatting and strolling through the gardens, lost in lives of their own, Leia sat on a low wall under a tree, feeling oddly disenchanted. She held her face angled up towards the warmth of the sun dappling through the canopy of leaves overhead, hoping it would banish the melancholy that brewed inside her.

Tiny peals of high-pitched laughter rang out from nearby and drew Leia's eyes in their direction. Over the low hedge of tri-lakka bushes, she spied two small, human boys running in circles with boundless energy, giggling and gasping with rambunctious abandon. It was infectious and she couldn't help the smile that splayed across her features.

Something sharp and heavy pulled at her heartstrings, drawing her further down. The innocence of children, the carefree joy and wonder. Did their parents ever question it? Did they lie awake at night, pondering the future possibilities with worry or dread?

Her eyes fell on the violet grass beneath her feet and her expression darkened. She contemplated the yellow flowers that blossomed through the grass, pushing up and angling to the sunlight to survive. It must be nice to be as simple a life form as a flower, nothing to worry about except receiving the nourishment of the water and the sun that, here in the Tanku Gardens on Chandrilla, sustained its life. Yes, Leia thought she might like to be a flower.

She had thought the oasis of nature might clear her head but she found it still infinitely crowded. Lately, the drudgery of life helping to run a government seemed empty. Constant battles on the Senate floor that garnered fruitless results were endlessly dissatisfying. She almost yearned for the days of the Rebellion, when the fighting had been clear cut, the wins and losses painfully obvious _._ The absence of death surrounding her was the one saving grace these days.

With a sigh, Leia rose to her feet and began the journey back to her office, where reports awaited her perusal. She placed her hands in the pockets of her long, white jacket that was buttoned at her naval in the current style. Longing for something more comfortable, more casual, she lowered her eyes to the ground, watched the brown, stone floor sweep beneath her feet, each step becoming a part of her past.

The past had been consistently in her thoughts lately, for better or worse, entwined with visions of the future. How much of who she was could be attributed to her past? How much had been predetermined? And what part did the Force play in it? These thoughts had been edging into her mind more and more.

' _The future is always in motion.'_

Ever since Luke had told her that, she had wondered about fate. If some things were fated, as many believed, how was the future in motion? Were there choices to their actions? Or was there just an illusion of choice?

She reached the Senate building and stopped to gaze up at where it towered to the sky. Was this all there was? Why did she suddenly want more? Why was her heart suddenly heavy with things she never wanted?

###

Han was happy to be home. Having won the race at Xa Fel, he found himself missing Leia. Sometimes, it was hard to believe that he had a home, a wife that he was so quickly drawn back to.

He punched in the entry code to his home, hoping that Leia had already returned from the office.

The main room was revealed as empty. As he dropped his travelpack to the floor, he heard her voice drift from the corridor leading to the kitchen.

"You're home!"

He grinned, hearing his own excitement and relief mirrored there. They met in the corridor, halfway between the main room and the kitchen. Han saw instantly that, in spite of the welcoming smile she graced him with, there was something brewing behind those expressive eyes of hers.

They embraced, mutual longing bringing them together. He kissed the top of her head and clung to her. Before he had left for the latest race, she had seemed small and quiet. She had not been forthcoming about what was on her mind. At this point, he knew that she would not talk until she was good and ready. He had let her be in the hopes that upon his return, she might be more willing to open up.

"I missed you." He moved to take a step away but she held on tightly and it gave him pause. He closed his arms more fully around her until finally she loosened her grip. "You okay, Sweetheart?"

With a small smile that did not reach her eyes, she nodded, took his hand, and tugged him along with her through the kitchen, into the dining room, and down the corridor towards the bedroom.

"You don't waste any time," he muttered.

She smiled with a dismissive head shake. "I just want to be close to you for a bit."

Han thought he detected a tinge of vulnerability in her voice. He allowed her to lead him to the bed. After kicking his boots off, he climbed up and propped his back against the headboard. When Leia joined him, she curled into his arms, legs pulled up almost in a fetal position.

Placing both arms around her, he murmured, "Guess you missed me, too."

"I did." Everything about her voice and posture screamed that something was troubling her deeply.

They remained unmoving for a time. Finally, his gentle voice jostled her. "What's on your mind?"

Her hand found his and she held them up together, as if contemplating them. Then, she brought his hand to her lips and kissed it lingeringly.

"Talk to me," he implored, voice low and soothing.

Eyes still on their joined hands, she spoke in a quiet, toneless voice. "Everything seems so pointless these days."

"What do you mean?"

"I make no difference in the Senate. I don't even know what I'm working towards anymore."

"Is this about the MDA?"

"Yes. No." She shook her head in frustration. "I don't know."

"You can't win 'em all."

"I know."

He wondered if this was about the Force. Perhaps Luke's pleas had finally gotten to her. "You wanna quit the Senate?"

"I couldn't."

"Well, you could."

Her head moved briskly back and forth. "I couldn't. I have to try to balance things out."

She felt she was making no difference, yet she had to try. He wasn't sure where she was going with this. "Okay…"

With a sigh, she continued quietly. "I find myself wanting more lately. Wanting something I hadn't expected to want."

It was about the Force. Han didn't like it. But, he could hardly stop her. "Well…think about it for a while. Don't do anything hasty."

She tilted her head to look at him, brow tight. "What do you mean?"

He shrugged. "Just…don't rush into anything."

She stared at him in a moment of quiet confusion. "What do you think I'm talking about?"

Suddenly, uncertain, he hesitated. "Training to be a Jedi?"

A soft laugh fell from her lips. "No. I don't want to be a Jedi."

His brow wrinkled in confusion and he gave her a questioning look.

She sunk more deeply into his embrace, head tucking beneath his chin, growing silent long enough for him to begin worrying.

"Leia, what is it?"

She sighed. "I think…I want to have a baby."

He would have been less shocked had she said she wanted a pet rancor. For a long moment, he was at a loss for words. Abruptly, he realized he needed to say something.

"I thought…" His voice came out a croak and he cleared his throat before continuing. "I thought we… _you_ …had decided you didn't want to."

"I thought I had, too," she replied in a small voice.

Han's thoughts were incoherent. He wasn't sure how he felt about the prospect of having a child. Leia had been quick to decide against the idea. So, he had never given it a thought.

"Are you sure about this?"

"No," she answered quickly. "I want it. But, I'm scared.

"Of the dark side."

She nodded from below his chin and they sat in silence, each with their own thoughts. His were a bit of a whirlwind.

"How do you feel about having a child?" she asked hesitantly.

His eyes widened at the thought. "I don't know," he answered honestly. "I've never thought about it. I know you'd be a great mother."

"Thank you." He could hear the smile in her voice.

What kind of father he might be, he couldn't imagine. The thought of being someone's father seemed impossible. What could he possibly draw upon for such an experience? He knew how to do many things. Raising a child was not one of them.

"I keep going back to the question of nature versus nurture," she admitted.

He wondered if the idea of a baby had been on her mind when they last had that conversation.

She sat up suddenly to face him. "I mean, look at you. Did you have any positive role models growing up?"

The question caused him to tense up, and he shook his head, mouth scrunched to one corner of his face.

"But, you're a wonderful man, in spite of that. Is that nature? Is that genetics?"

His thoughts became dubious at her use of the words 'wonderful man.' If anything had made him a good man, it was Leia. He shrugged, lacking any other response.

Her expression grew tormented. "I just don't know."

"Maybe you should talk to Luke about this."

"Luke's viewpoint is too skewed."

"And yours isn't?"

By her responding look of chagrin, Han could tell she hadn't thought about it that way before.

"The truth is probably somewhere in the middle," he said.

Her eyes lowered. "I suppose. But, what does that mean?" Her gaze returned to his. "That there's a fifty-fifty chance that we could have a child who turns out to be a monster, like Vader?"

He thought about it for a minute. "I'd think no one ever knows how a kid'll turn out.

"But, they don't start out with such a strong possibility of them being a monster."

"You don't even know that's true."

"I don't know that it's not."

He was trying to be logical, but she had a response for everything. They were talking in circles. "Sweetheart, we don't have the answers. There's no way to know what the answer is." He wasn't even sure what he _wanted_ the answer to be. A baby?

"I guess you're right."

Her voice was heavy and it tore at his heart a little. At that moment, he knew that if she truly wanted a baby, he would agree to it. He struggled for the right thing to say. "I guess…you have to decide how much you want it. If it's worth the risk, if there is a risk."

She nodded, eyes downcast, and Han felt a familiar pang that came whenever something she wanted was not in reach. He wanted to give her everything she desired. He had realized that on Endor and it continued to be true. Gathering her in his arms, he held her tightly for a long time.


	19. Chapter 19: Kismet

This story has gone by so fast! Only 2 chapters left after this. But, I have a new fic ready and waiting. It's called Shackled and it's an AU in which Leia is the one chasing after Han. A few readers have mentioned that they were interested in reading this and the story is much more involved than just that and is very, very long, but that is a major aspect of the plot.

Thank you all so much for reading this story :) On to more of Leia's conflict!

###

The melancholy was beginning to seep into everything she did. Sitting on the balcony of her apartment in her sleepgown, Leia sipped her kaffe pensively, brow drawn down. Having tossed and turned all night, she had risen much earlier than usual. The sun had yet to show itself and all was quiet and peaceful. Her eyes tracked the lights of a lone hovercar angling away in the distance.

She hated being indecisive, despised the hazy gray of the unknown. She was accustomed to having a plan for anything and everything. Having been described as 'controlling' in the past, often by Han, she couldn't completely deny it. Although, she preferred to think of it as 'prepared.'

Things rarely went as planned, she had to admit that fact. Sometimes, it was for the best. Other times, not so much. She was often willing to risk all, but this time she was extremely reticent.

How would she feel if she didn't know the truth of her parentage? Would it even be an issue? Perhaps she only wanted this so badly because she might not be able to have it. Han had left the decision to her. She could take the easier path and simply do nothing. If she took the risk, what might she be unleashing on the galaxy?

In these unhurried moments, Leia found things the most difficult. Images came to her, of a boy with Han's eyes and scruffy hair; or a girl with his eyes and her petite stature. She thought of the physical differences between Luke and herself then wondered which attributes she might pass on to a child; how much the child would take from her husband, and how much from her.

The thought drifted naturally to Vader. How much of _him_ would be passed onto such a child?

Had her father worried about the same things while raising her? Had he felt any hesitation about taking the child of a monster into his home?

There were so many questions she wished she could ask him. And her mother…pain invaded her heart with an intensity she hadn't felt in a long time. She closed her eyes and a numbness settled over her. A few deep breaths later and she had dispelled it, was able to breathe freely again. Loneliness suddenly stole over her and she swept back into the bedroom, content to simply reside in the same space as her husband.

Placing her mug on the bedside table, she settled on the floor, knees up, arms hugging her legs. Her chin rested on her knees. Han lay on his side, facing her, lips creased in a line, visage relaxed in sleep. She had always liked to look at him while he slept, when he was unguarded, unable to put up any defenses. He looked softer, almost boyish, this man who hadn't had much of a boyhood. She wondered what he had looked like as a child. If they had a son, would he look like that long-ago child who had struggled to survive in a world where the harshness of reality was introduced to him at too young an age? Her eyes roamed the beloved contours of his face, lingering on the curve of his lips, the hard line of his jaw.

A son…or a daughter.

As if sensing her scrutiny, he stirred slightly, taking a soft breath through his nose. His eyes opened slowly, unfocused and hazy. When those twin hazel beacons found her, she knew her answer. A slow smile curved his lips and Leia rose from the floor and slipped into bed beside him. Their arms slid around each other and his skin was warm and delicious beneath her hands. Her gaze seized his with a small smile and, as if sensing something within her, his expression turned serious and questioning.

She bit her lip. "Let's do it. Let's have a baby," she whispered, carefully gauging his reaction.

His brow quickly rose in surprise. His eyes took in the whole of her expression, her eyes, the lines of her face. Then, he gave her a tiny smile and a brief nod. "Okay," he answered quietly.

Pushing down her apprehension, she pulled his head close and kissed him with the fierce intensity of her decision.

###

"Maybe it's a sign," Leia said in a small voice.

Han had seen this coming, had been waiting for it like one waits for the lightning after a crack of thunder. Running a towel over his wet body, he turned to her in the bright light of the refresher. She looked small and lost, wearing his long, white shirt. It was the same shirt she had worn during the trip to Bespin and he had noticed some time ago that when she was feeling sad, she often slept in it, like a child clinging to a favorite blanket for comfort.

"I don't believe in signs," he said gently, pausing to place a soft kiss on her lips.

"You don't believe in anything," she said petulantly.

He grinned. "I believe in you."

That garnered a smile that faded too quickly. "It's been two months since I reversed the shot."

"Two months isn't that long."

She said nothing, just followed him into the bedroom. He dropped his towel to the floor and opened some drawers to retrieve his clothes. When he turned around, she was right behind him.

"Give it some time," he said gently, stepping into his undershorts.

She nodded, arms wrapped around herself. "I just feel…"

He grabbed his pants and waited for her to continue. "Feel what?" he asked when she remained silent.

"Like nothing is within my control."

He allowed the lopsided grin to crawl up one side of his face. "Well, we all know how much you hate _that_ ," he drawled.

She met his gaze with steely eyes. "I'm serious. Do you know what's being said about me among the Senate?"

He sobered quickly with a shake of his head.

"That I'm an alarmist and a warmonger."

"That's ridiculous."

She splayed her hands in frustration.

Anger boiled beneath his surface. "Anyone who really knows you knows that's not true."

"Well, from what I hear, Mon is leading the chant," she said bitterly.

Fury burst in his chest. "Well, to hell with all of 'em! After everything you've done for this galaxy! Everything you've sacrificed!"

Her stormy eyes cleared in the face of his anger. "Han, it's okay."

"No, it's not okay! Let's just leave."

"Leave?"

"Yeah, leave. Quit the Senate. Let's leave Chandrila, let the government run without you. They don't want your help? They don't deserve it," he sneered.

"I can't do that."

"Sure, you can."

"No," she said quietly. "There's too much at stake. I don't trust the former members of the Empire to adhere to the Galactic Concordance. I _have_ to keep fighting to rearm the Republic, before something tragic happens."

Jaw set, he said nothing. He didn't like it, but he knew that Leia was far too determined and wouldn't just walk away. With a grimace that he was unable to suppress, he shrugged into his pants and fastened them.

"I packed your bag while you were in the shower," she said quietly.

"Thank you." He softened against his will, glancing up to see the travelpack sitting on the chair beside the door.

Her eyes lowered and her lips pressed grimly together.

"You okay?"

"Yes."

"But?"

"I didn't mean to upset you. I just wanted to vent."

He felt a grimace steal over his features. "I'm sorry." Running his hands up and down her arms, he tried out an encouraging smile. "Go ahead. Vent. I'll just listen."

She sighed but said nothing. Han took her chin in his hand and raised her gaze to his, eyes apologetic and pleading.

Finally, she spoke in a quiet, passionate voice, eyes burning into his. "It feels as if everything I fought so hard for is going to fall apart. And I'm being looked at as a pariah for thinking so."

Han squashed the anger that again rose inside him. "Aren't politicians always disagreeing?"

"It's different this time. The MDA is being treated like the salvation for the galaxy. Support is spreading like wildfire. Opposition is low. And those of us who oppose it and are clamoring for remilitarization are being portrayed as war hungry. I'm afraid this is a battle I can't win. And that it will mean eventual devastation for the galaxy."

His lips twisted into a sympathetic grimace.

"I hope I'm wrong," she continued. "Nothing would make me happier. Peace has always been the goal. We finally have it, but how do we maintain it?"

"Maybe you should start your own army," he said lightly.

"Trust me, I've thought about it."

He had meant it as a joke, but now he wasn't certain if she might be serious. "Well, what about Luke?"

"Luke?"

"Yeah. He wants to make some new Jedi. Maybe that'll be the key to keeping the peace."

"Make some new Jedi? What? From spare parts?" She smiled and he was glad to see it.

He smiled back with half his mouth and chucked his chin in her direction. "You know what I mean."

"Yes, I know what you mean." Her lips quirked up a bit higher. "And maybe you're right. But, that's not going to happen overnight. Meanwhile, who knows what the ex-Imperials are doing? I don't believe they'll adhere to the Galactic Concordance."

"I don't blame you," he muttered.

"I feel like everything is on the verge of falling apart. And I can't control any of it. Not even my own body."

He pulled her into his arms. "Well, think of it this way," he said over the top of her head. "We didn't make a baby yet, but we get to keep havin' fun trying."

"This is true."

"Personally, I think we should give it one last shot before I go."

"Chewie's waiting for you in the main room."

"Let the big furball wait." He pulled back to look at her and found her smiling up at him. It warmed his heart. He lowered his mouth to hers and maneuvered her backwards to the bed. Bending down, he wrapped his arms around her torso and lifted her against him before deepening the kiss. He felt her hips press into his and there was suddenly nothing else in his thoughts.

Placing her in the center of the bed, he lifted the shirt over her head and sent it flying. She was naked beneath and his eyes perused her body, the familiar lines and curves that always seemed as if he were admiring her for the first time. After three years, she still thrilled him as much as the first time.

His eyes found hers with a gentle smile and she stared back, serious and intent.

"I'll miss you," she whispered.

"I'll miss you too." He felt suddenly guilty that he would be gone for four weeks on a grand circuit of the Annual Galactic Racing Tour. It was par for the course, but he hadn't been gone so long since he had resigned his commission. And Leia was going through a hard time. "I could stay…"

"No. Go. I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself."

He searched the depths of her eyes, found her sincere, and nodded shortly. Kissing her slowly, his tongue running along her lower lip, a dull ache formed in his chest. Part of him wanted to stay.

Her hands were cool and light on his back and she slid them lower, into the back of his pants, as their tongues frolicked together in her mouth. He was hard and straining, bulging inside his pants; as they kissed and their hands played over each other's bodies, a sudden desperation coming over them.

Her breath came, fast and erotic against his lips, and sudden need engulfed him. Before he could think, her hands were at the fastening of his pants and she was pushing them past his hips. With several kicks of his feet, he was able to disentangle them and they fell somewhere, forgotten.

She was as eager as he, and it made him want her even more, desire claiming him completely. Her hand was suddenly on him, stroking with delicious intensity, and he pressed a slow finger inside her, found her already wet and wanting him. Her gasping exhalation at his touch was more than he could take and he drove inside her with a suddenness that made them both cry out sharply in pleasure.

He was still for a moment, simply reveling in the blissful sensation of being inside her. Then, her hips moved to urge him deeper and he thrust slowly, sinking into her, resisting the natural instinct to furiously pump his hips. She let out a deep moan and Han drew back, teasing them both with the tantalizing pleasure. Burying himself inside her again, he repeated the motions of almost leaving her heat then thrusting more deeply, again and again. In utter harmony, they gasped together, shared a visceral moan, and gasped again.

Leia's nails dug into his back and the biting pleasure halted his rhythm, almost sending him too soon over the edge.

"Leia…" He barely realized he had spoken.

She pushed at his shoulders. "On your back, Hotshot," she rasped quietly.

Surprise rocked his mind for a moment and then he smiled at her, withdrew, and moved to lie on his back. With a coy smile, she straddled him, sitting up and lowering herself slowly, until he was again completely inside her. Her hands drew down his chest, nails raking gently.

"Start over now," she said, eyebrows raised, a teasing glint in her eye.

"Yes, Ma'a-," he began to answer, but then she started the movement of her hips and his words turned to a low groan.

She set the pace, slow and sensuous, an erotic, gliding motion that obliterated all thought from Han's mind. He ached to thrust faster, but she had all the control and was taking her time to drive their arousal higher and higher towards a peaking climax. Her movements grew quicker and he could feel the fire building inside her, matching his own.

From somewhere behind him, the comm began bleating steadily. Nothing mattered less to him than that noise.

He felt her inner muscles begin to tense and pulse around him, could tell by her harsh breaths and throaty moans that she was nearing that final point of ecstasy. He grabbed her hips and held her in place, pounding his buttocks up and off the bed; a strangled scream escaped her as she shuddered, legs quivering, and Han was surging inside her, streaming through her in the agony of ecstasy. It seemed never ending as their bodies trembled together in the aftershock of passion, until Leia tumbled forward onto his chest and the tremors began to subside.

The beeping of the comm eventually became unbearable and he swore under his breath, gently rolled his wife on her side, and fumbled for his holster. Unclipping the comm, he pressed the button and growled into it.

"Keep your fur on, I'll be right out!" He turned it off and clipped it back on. With a long suffering sigh, he clambered back onto the bed and Leia was smiling at him dreamily. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her firmly.

"Well, that will insure that you think about me while you're gone."

He grinned back. "Sweetheart, I always think about you when I'm gone."

Her smile softened. "I hope we made a baby."

That trickle of anxiety crawled up his spine. He could never deny her something she really wanted. But, he was still uneasy about the idea of fatherhood. He kissed her softly then rose from the bed and pulled his undershorts and pants back on. Leia also stood as he rounded the other side and grabbed a shirt from his dresser. As he closed it, he turned to find Leia slipping into her long, white robe.

There was always a slight sense of loss when he left her, regardless of how temporary it was. He watched her cinch the robe shut, heart tugging slightly. Ambling over to her, he took her face in his hands and kissed her, slow and light. They gazed into each other's eyes for a long moment, searching and finding what they sought.

And then, he had to go. With one arm around her shoulders, he guided her to the door, slung his pack over the opposite shoulder, and they left the room together.

In the main room, Chewie rose from a chair, snarling loudly. He sniffed the air and rolled his large blue eyes with an irritated grunt.

The couple paid him no mind. The trio had long ago abandoned any pretense of modesty between them. The Wookiee had seen them both at their best, their worst, and had caught them in various compromising positions, going as far back as Bespin. They were more than even family at this point.

Han turned to enfold Leia in his arms, ignoring Chewie's impatient grumble. She squeezed him tightly and he kissed the top of her head.

"I'll comm you when we get to Thyferra."

"Okay."

He stepped back, took her hand and squeezed it. "Bye."

She squeezed back. "Bye."

Letting go, he walked to the door. Chewie's departing growl was much friendlier now.

"Bye, Chewie," Leia called fondly.

As the door slid shut behind them, Han heard Leia shout, "I love you!"

With a grin, he turned back, punched in the code, and the door slid open once more. "I know," he called out as she spun back towards the door. Dual smiles caught and held as the door slid shut again between them.


	20. Chapter 20: Life

There seems to have been a problem with this chapter. Thank you JainaDurron7 for alerting me to it! Let's try this again...

###

In the silence of the Millennium Falcon's cockpit, Han's eyes stared unseeing into the vast nothingness of hyperspace. Normally, this was a place of peace and contemplation for him. Somehow, his thoughts were still in turmoil.

The closer they got to the actual possibility of having a baby, the more unnerved he became. He couldn't possibly admit this to Leia. She already had enough doubts of her own, he would not add to them.

Of course, she would be a wonderful mother. She was the most caring being he had ever known.

But, how could he possibly share responsibility for a young life? To guide and shape a child throughout his or her lifetime? He couldn't imagine.

His reverie was interrupted when Chewie returned, growling a question.

"Two more hours," Han replied distractedly.

His co-pilot regarded him for a moment then whined softly and replaced himself in his seat, turning to face Han.

Han's eyes lowered to the instrument panel before him and for a moment he said nothing. With a deep sigh, he decided to confide in his friend. "How did you feel when you found out Mala was having Lumpy?" He tried to reconcile the idea of a baby with an actual child. Lumpy had once been this unknown baby that his father knew nothing of.

In a subdued tone, Chewie spoke of learning that Mala was expecting, his surprise, trepidation, and pride.

Eyes still unfocused, Han nodded and sighed again. Chewie barked gently.

"I dunno. It's just…I don't know anything about having a kid. What if I screw this kid up?"

Chewbacca assured him that he hadn't known how to be a father either, had learned as he went along and followed his instincts.

"I don't have any instincts when it comes to this."

The Wookiee chuckled. The instinct would come.

Han was dubious, even when Chewie promised to be there every step of the way.

###

Whisper moths fluttered in Leia's stomach as she checked fight arrival statuses for the fifth time that hour. Han was due back today, but she had no idea what time he would arrive. The wait was making her crazy. She activated the remote beside her. Within moments, the door slid open and Threepio's golden body shuffled through the doorway.

"Yes, Mistress Leia? How may I be of service?"

"Threepio, can you please monitor flight arrivals at the Hanna Spaceport and inform me the moment that the Millenium Falcon requests clearance?"

The droid drew up to his full height, seeming pleased to have an assignment. "Why of course, Mistress Leia, I would be happy to. If there is anything else that I can do to be of assistance—."

Leia lacked the patience today. "That will be all. Thank you."

"Yes, Your Highness."

She bit her tongue at the use of her former title and turned away from the sight of his retreating form.

She had spent an anxious two weeks waiting impatiently to share the news with her husband. Several times, she had almost yielded to temptation and told him over the vidcomm. But, no, she wanted to tell him in person, wanted to be able to look into his eyes and celebrate in his embrace.

She knew Han had his doubts and fears. He was keeping them to himself, but she could feel it. It was understandable, based on his background. But, somehow, Leia just knew that Han would be a good father. Perhaps it was the Force that conveyed that message. Or, maybe it was instinctual. She had confidence in him. And, eventually, he would have that confidence in himself.

###

From the main hold of the Millennium Falcon, Han heard and felt the rumble of the boarding ramp lowering. His hand automatically moved to his blaster before he realized that it had to be Leia. He was surprised. When was the last time she had shown up to greet him upon arrival? It was an odd, but pleasant surprise. He headed through the corridor to greet her.

They met at the source of the main corridor and he noted her radiant smile, felt it buoy his spirit. She halted in place then vaulted herself into his arms.

"Hey," he said, catching her in his embrace. He laughed lightly. "I missed you, too."

"I'm so happy you're back."

The sincerity of her tone made him feel almost guilty for having left. He ran his hands along her back and held her more tightly. "Me too."

When she finally pulled back to look at him, her eyes were unmistakably bright. She looked so much happier than she had in some time. Her hands rested against his chest as she beamed up at him.

"I have something to tell you." She was breathless, brimming with excitement.

For a moment, Han couldn't fathom what she was about to say. Then, in a sudden flash, he knew. Warmth rushed through him, unexpected and uncertain. His mouth dropped open and it took him a moment to respond. "You…are you…?" Words failed him.

Her lips pressed together and the ends of her mouth curled upwards as she nodded vigorously.

Frozen in time for a long moment, he was at a loss. What did he think? What did he feel? His thoughts turned inward.

An unexpected feeling of contentment settled over him. Now that it was here, now that it was reality, he felt at peace with it. A baby. A child. It would be okay. Leia would be by his side and they would do this. Together.

It was going to be fine.

A slow smile spread across his face, and it was more genuine than he would have expected. He brought his hands up to surround her face and her smile of pure joy melted something deep inside him.

He kissed her, swiftly and soundly, both of them still smiling around their joined lips.

A joyful roar sounded from behind Han, and Chewie was suddenly there, huge arms hugging them both, congratulating them with unbridled enthusiasm.

And for the first time, Han felt like a real, happy, little family.


	21. Chapter 21: Egress

The final chapter is here! Thank you all so much for the support, reading, following, reviewing! It means a lot to me :) I hope you enjoy the ending.

Sunday I will begin posting my new fic, Shackled. It's an AU and begins several weeks before ANH, when Han attempts to free Chewbacca from slavery. Unfortunately, Han does not succeed and ends up a captive as well. Through a twist of fate, Leia buys Han and Chewie and now they owe the Rebellion for their release. There are many twists and turns, it deviates from the canon timeline, as does the relationship between Han and Leia. Hope you will check it out :)

###

The shipping crates were packed and loaded on the transport, and the apartment looked just as it had on that long ago, lonely day when Leia had first arrived. The only aberration was the tree from their wedding, which was now in a larger pot and stood three feet tall. One shipping crate sat beside the door in the main room. Inside it were the six holos she had collected since then. She did not trust those items onboard any ship but the Falcon.

It had been an interesting decision for the New Republic to relocate the capitol planet every few years. Leia felt both pleased to be moving on from Chandrila, yet sad at the same time.

The tiny life that lie inside her chose that moment to shift, a fluttering movement that still froze and amazed her. She placed one hand on the bulge of her stomach, smiling with wonder.

"Hope the next place has a nicer kitchen," Han called as he entered the room from behind her.

She turned and smiled, beckoning him with a wave of her other hand. His expression grew quickly serious, almost reverent as he came closer and placed a tentative hand on her belly. Every time he felt the baby move, his eyes were filled with a sense of awe she had never seen in them before.

They waited quietly, expectant, eyes downcast, expressions sober. Finally, beneath their hands, the tiny life shuffled, rippling a small swell that protruded for just a moment before lowering and disappearing into her distended stomach.

Their eyes met and after a look of sheer amazement, Han smiled with a quick breath, eyes soft and intent on hers. She smiled back, basking in the sweetness of his reaction.

"I love you," she whispered tenderly, an undeniable tightness constricting her throat. These pregnancy hormones were wreaking havoc on her.

His mouth screwed up and bunched to one side, reminding her of the first time he had uttered the words. "I love you." He exhaled and swallowed in a way that left her wondering if his throat might feel tight as well.

His eyes dropped and followed the caress of his hand across her stomach. "Hard to believe there's a little human in there."

"I know. Three more months and we get to meet him."

A flicker of anxiety came and went behind his eyes. He nodded solemnly.

"I hope he has your eyes," she said softly.

He smiled. "I hope _she_ has _your eyes."_ They shared a grin of sublime happiness until Han smirked. "One thing's for sure. This kid'll be stubborn as hell."

Leia laughed lightly and turned to peruse the apartment one last time. She leaned into Han, her emotions a jumble. His arm went around her shoulders. "In some ways, it almost feels like we just arrived."

He murmured agreement over her head.

"We've had a nice life here."

"We'll have a nice life in the next place, too. Nicer, even," he added, running a hand over her belly.

So many emotions burst inside her at his words. "You're right."

"As always," he replied smugly.

She placed her arms around his waist and smiled at his predictability. "I'm going to miss our bed."

"I've got some pretty fond memories of that bed." His eyes sparkled down into hers.

Her grin beamed back at him.

"You ready?"

"No…yes." With a deep sigh, she walked to the door and lifted the small box of holos.

"You okay with that?" He went to the tree and picked it up by the pot.

"Yes, it weighs nothing."

He nodded and his eyes roamed the space around them before he wandered to where Leia stood by the door. They traded anxious, expectant smiles and he kissed her forehead gently.

"C'mon, Princess." He gestured to the door with a jerk of his chin.

Leia nodded, palmed the front door open, and they walked out the door together, ready to face their future elsewhere.

END


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